Music is almost unanimously considered haram. Only recently have people started saying otherwise, with rather flimsy evidence.
Dancing is fine so long as it isn't sexual or in front of the opposite gender (unless they're your wife or family).
Grave worship is shirk, and explicitly forbidden. It's a nullifier of one's belief in Islam. This isn't a minor thing, doing this makes you a non Muslim.
The fact that Hindus did it as a ritual means we should avoid it even more, Islam doesn't assimilate, it rather makes others assimilate to its own standards.
Sufism didn't blend in with Hindusim btw, Sufism was just more appealing to people in the region as it allowed music and dance and shrines and what not, where as traditional Islam didn't.
