LIFE
A Pakistani Army Soldier Tweeted His Frightening Encounter With the Taliban
By
S.K Pakistan
Posted on April 27, 2016
Everyone loves a good story, especially when it’s not fictional and is actually based on real events. Such a story was told yesterday by a
Pakistan Army soldier who tweeted his encounter with the Taliban in the Mohmand Agency.
The exceptionally well-written story was praised by Pakistani Twitterati and journalists – they spoke of the soldier’s writing skills and his bravery. The story is funny and nerve-wracking at the same time. You’re going to absolutely love it!
AND SO HE BEGAN…
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
Okay so this one time in Mohmand Agency, we were ordered to mop up a valley (clear it off terrorists)
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
We were already half way inside the valley and had setup a stronghold just beyond their mortar range.
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
But someone had to advance further ahead and penetrate the line of fire. For that, my CO chose me.
@TheGutterfly
2
6 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
And like a good little qurbani k bakra that I was I said yessirr!
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
So I had a squadron of tanks under my command and I was leading the squadron. Slowly creeping further inside their territory
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
That was my first independent operation that I conducted so I was also very nervous. But I had to show my men
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
That I have nerves of steel right (bullshit I was scared shitless) but I stood up on the back side of the turret in the open
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
I was roaring and we were raising battle cries and whatnot. Okay one more thing...
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
The squadrons that were attached with our outfit, they were a part of the FC. And trust me when I say that don't trust the FC
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
Anyhoo, we crept further inside and strangely enough we weren't being raided by the fire which I was expecting.
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
The idea was to locate the terrorists when they'd fire and then engage them from long distance with my tanks.
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
But those conniving motherfuckers let me in further. I know what you're thinking. I had to know better. But I dint.
@TheGutterfly
2
6 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
As I was standing behind the opened cupola and sharing the possibility of an ambush with the tank commander ..
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
Along came the infamous whizzing sound of a bullet. It nearly missed the tk comd's head and almost tore the cupola.
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
As a result the tk comdr immediately shut down the cupola and went inside the tk. Now I was out in the open without any cover
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
When u've been in war long enough u observe little things about the surroundings that come in handy. It's called minor tactics@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
@TheGutterfly in a layman's terms, had it hit me, it would've torn me to pieces. So anyways..
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
So I'm standing on the tank shouting ******** at the top of my voice and I jumped behind the tank and laid my back against
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
..track of the tanks. And then guess what
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
The fucking driver lost his shit completely and started reversing the fucking tank.
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
I shouted and cursed him at the top of my voice but the joke was on me because he couldn't hear me over the sound of intense
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
...fire and the tanks engine. So I had only two ways two go. Left or right. Both suicide because I had to expose myself to
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
..the incoming. So I read nad e Ali and started running like a dog towards the line of trees some 300 meters away to my right
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
While I was running with the AK47 hanging at my back and cursing myself for wearing a thigh holster with my viking..
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
I was recalling those movies where the guy who's about to die gets flashes of his life and loved ones and whatnot..
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
I tried thinking about my mum and dad and girlfriend but they just wouldn't come. I couldn't even make myself think about
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
Them. I kept cursing all those movies all the while running with intense machine gun, 12.7 mm, 14.5, mortar and sniper
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
Firing at me with all their might. Because they had figured that I was the officer and it's better to kill an officer than
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
A battalion of non commissioned. So I escaped the first volley and jumped inside the clump. But it seemed as if they were
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
Eveeywhere.
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
Now I was detached from my men completely. The FC tanks had abandoned me and had started withdrawing.
@TheGutterfly
2
6 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
The sun was slowly setting and the evenings chill was taking over the days warmth
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
My camos were drenched in mud, knee high from running through a swamp (something I dint realise while running)
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
I had scratches all over my hands and face from jumping in the clump. They were still firing but it was gradually
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
Slowing down. My worst nightmare (Because that means that they've stopped firing from distance and are closing in on you)
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
I lit up my last cigarette in day light and started looking for better cover
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
Kept running way inside the jungle. I saw a graveyard.
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
The night was settling in, the graveyard seemed very old with only rocks for tombstones and a couple of vaccant graves
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
Of sorts...
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
I dug a little deeper with my hands and bayonet and helmet and filled it up with dried leaves.
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
It was to be my sanctuary for the night. Now I could hear those fuckers in the distance
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
I hid my helmet in the other grave , lied down in the grave and covered myself up with leaves.
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
My AK on my chest with its muzzle on my crotch, the weapon was unsafe and my finger in the trigger guard
@TheGutterfly
2
6 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
I was more worried about shooting my dick off in accidental fire than the terrorists
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
Now I could hear their voices very clearly. They were speaking in Pushto and arguing about if there was one guy or two.
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
Thankfully they agreed on two. I could hear the sound of my heart pounding out of my chest. It was intense.
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
It started itching on my groin as they were less than 20 paces away from me
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
Ugh it was so fucking tantalizing. But I couldn't because obviously, how fucking dumb are you?
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
They kept roaming about the area for a couple of hours and went back to their hideout.
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
I opened my radio and started listening. I couldn't talk because the terrorists eavesdrop on radiocomm
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
@TheGutterfly so I just pressed the pushin and kept it pressed
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
When somebody pressed the pushin button on a radio device, no one remains able to talk on that particular channel.
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
@TheGutterfly I kept it pressed for an hour before my CO got pissed off and got everyone's Motorola checked. And then it hit the Jarhead
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
That it might've been me trying to give a signal that cheeky bastard
@TheGutterfly
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
@TheGutterfly so he called on the main channel, called me out and asked me to switch to channel 3 if I was listening. I did.
26 Apr
Gov'nor @TheGutterfly
Then I sent him my gps loc in morse code and he sent a rescue team.
@TheGutterfly
Follow
The end.
@TheGutterf4:56 AM - 26 Apr 2016
http://www.parhlo.com/a-pakistani-army-soldier-tweeted-his-frightening-encounter-with-the-taliban/