Indus Pakistan
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The whole point of nukes is prevention. MAD doctrine. In that sense they are working. If there had been no nukes given India's overwhelming advantage in numbers she would have attacked Pakistan in a all out war along the entire border. This did not happen. Instead fencing between both sides took place. Of course there is always the danger things could go out of control. But that risk existed in the Cold War. Read Cuban crisis.You are correct, except that the point of them is to not use them. If there was a full-scale war, like I see some on both sides hoping for, the only thing "equal" will be the destruction of population centers in both countries.
Nominal to much reduced. We were fed regular diet of BBC public relays about what to do in event of nuke war - hide in basement. Not joking here.The threat of exchange still exists in Europe.
Because you very rarely engaged or interfaced with each other. There was physical distance and pre 1990s there was no internet or scope of regular contact with each other. Much of the contact was limited to officials.But the Americans/Russians do not hate each other
Today with advent of internet and mediums like PDF enable that hatred to be manifested. In addition both countries have huge youth population full of testesterone with little way of diffusing that energy. In the west chasing girls, drink, sport helps to release that pent up energy.
But the hatred between American/Russian ruling elites was as strong and evident. More real and potent then the South Asian masses. Look at the treasure and effort expanded to outdo each other.