Joke

[FairAndUnbiased]

Sounds like politicians of Pakistan and the person was none other than Geelani!

There's alot of people who can be said to be like this, use your imagination

 

[Sugarcane]

cool one - but you must have posted in Jokes collection

 

[alok mishra]

real joke.....

 

[yyetttt]

Pretty funny

 

[joekrish]

Good one mate.

 

[The SC]

Now everybody tell me what you would do if you were tha muslim man?

I'll save her but tell her politely that there is no need for sleeping with each other, seo nara.

 

[jha]

An elderly gentleman came home one night to find a homeless girl of about eighteen ransacking the place.

He grabbed her by the arm and was just about to call the police when the girl dropped down on her knees and pleaded, "Please don't call the police, mister, oh please!! If you don't, I'll let you make love to me and do whatever you want with my body!"

The old man thought for a moment and decided to give in. Soon they were naked and in bed together. The old man tried and tried harder, but finally, he rolls over, exhausted, and embarrassed.

"I'm sorry, young lady...but it's no use," he gasped... "I'm afraid I'm going to have to call the police after all."

 

[jha]

Brad had a blind date with Ashley for the prom and, as the evening progressed, he found himself attracted to her more and more.

After some really passionate embracing, he said, "Tell me, do you object to making love?"

"That's something I have never done before," Ashley replied.

"Never made love? You mean you are a virgin?" Brad was amazed.

"No, silly!" she giggled. "I've never objected!"

Another one...

Farmer Brown had been screwing one of his sheep for 5 years, when all of a sudden he was hit by pangs of conscience.

It bothered him so much that he decided that he just had to tell his priest about it in confession.

The priest was shocked and could only say to Farmer Brown, "Well, was the sheep a male or a female?"

"A female, of course," shouted Farmer Brown!. "What do you think I am... some sort of queer!"

 

[Sugarcane]

Jennifer, a manager at Wal-Mart, had the task of hiring someone to fill a job opening.. After sorting through a stack of 20 resumes she found four people who were equally qualified. Jennifer decided to call the four in and ask them only one question. Their answer would determine which of them would get the job.

The day came and as the four sat around the conference room table, Jennifer asked, 'What is the fastest thing you know of?'

The first man replied, 'A THOUGHT..' It just pops into your head. There's no warning.

'That's very good!' replied Jennifer. 'And, now you sir?' she asked the second man..

'Hmmm....let me see 'A blink! It comes and goes and you don't know that it ever happened. A BLINK is the fastest thing I know of.'

'Excellent!' said Jennifer. 'The blink of an eye, that's a very popular clich� for speed.' She then turned to the thirdman, who was contemplating his reply.

'Well, out at my dad's ranch, you step out of the house and on the wall there's a light switch. When you flip that switch, way out across the pasture the light on the barn comes on in less than an instant.. 'Yip, TURNING ON A LIGHT is the fastest thing I can think of'.

Jennifer was very impressed with the third answer and thought she had found her man. 'It's hard to beat the speed of light,' she said.

Turning to BUBBA, the fourth and final man, Jennifer posed the same question.

Old Bubba replied, 'After hearing the previous three answers, it's obvious to me that the fastest thing known is DIARRHEA.'

'WHAT!?' said Jennifer, stunned by the response...

'Oh sure', said BUBBA. 'You see, the other day I wasn't feeling so good, and I ran for the bathroom, but before I could THINK, BLINK, or TURN ON THE LIGHT, I had already **** my pants.'

BUBBA is now the new greeter at a Wal-Mart near you!

 

[Sugarcane]

A drunk man who smelled like beer, sat down on a subway next to a priest.
The man's tie was stained, his face was plastered with red lipstick and a half-empty bottle of gin was sticking out of his torn coat pocket.
He opened his newspaper and began reading.
After a few minutes, the man turned to the priest and asked, 'Say Father, what causes arthritis?'
The priest replies, 'My Son, it's caused by loose living, being with cheap, wicked women, too much alcohol, contempt for your fellow man, sleeping around with prostitutes and lack of a bath.'
The drunk muttered in response, 'Well, I'll be damned.....' then returned to his paper.
The priest, thinking about what he had said, nudged the man and apologized.
'I'm very sorry. I didn't mean to come on so strong. How long have you had arthritis?'
The drunk answered, 'I don't have it, Father. I was just reading here that the Pope does.'

 

[PoKeMon]

 

[Android]

Laloo, Rabri and his son were returning from south by train.
Laloo was occupying the lower berth, Rabri the middle berth and his son the top most berth in the train compartment.
The train stopped at one of the stations on the way back and the son asked Laloo to bring him a Cadburys chocolate. WhenLaloo and his son returned they found that a South Indian who couldn't understand Hindi had occupied his son's berth.
Upset and angry, Laloo called the Ticket checker & asked him to help. The Ticket checker said that he could not understand Hindi or Bihari so it would be nice if Laloo explained the whole situation to him in English.
So Laloo explained, "That man sleeping on top of my wife is not giving birth to my child."

 

[Sugarcane]

A mother was working in the kitchen and listening to her son playing with his new electric train in the living room.

She heard the train stop and her son say, "All of you sons of b!tches who want off, get the hell off now ' cause this is the last stop. And all of you sons of b!tches who are getting on get your a$$es in the train 'cause we're leaving."

The mother went into the living room and told her son, "We don't use that kind of language in this house. Now I want you to go to your room for two hours. When you come out you may play with your train. But I want you to use nice language."

Two hours later the son comes out of the bedroom and resumes playing with his train. Soon the train stopped and mother heard her son say, "All passengers who are disembarking the train please remember to take all of your belongings with you. We thank you for riding with us today and hope your trip was a pleasant one. We hope you will ride with us again soon."

"For those of you just boarding we ask you to store all your luggage under your seat. Remember there is no smoking except in the club car. We hope you will have a pleasant and relaxing journey with us."

"And for those of you who are pissed off about the two hour delay please see the ****** in the kitchen."

 

[Sugarcane]

A Blonde Bombshell buys the new Automatic BMW X8 sport.
She drives the car perfectly well during the day, but at night the car just won’t move at all.
She tries driving the car at night for a week but still no luck.She then furiously calls the
BMW dealers and they send out a technician to her.
The technician asks “Miss, are you sure you are using the right gears?”

Full of anger, she replies “You fool, idiot man, how you could ask such a question, I’m not stupid!

I use 'D' for the Day, and 'N' for the Night...”

 

[Sugarcane]

A tour bus driver is driving with a bus load of seniors down a highway when he is tapped on his shoulder by a little old lady. She offers him a handful of peanuts, which he gratefully munches up.


After about 15 minutes, she taps him on his shoulder again and she hands him another handful of peanuts.


She repeats this gesture about five more times.

When she is about to hand him another batch again ....he asks the little old lady, 'Why don't you eat the peanuts yourself?'.

'We can't chew them because we've no teeth', she replied.

The puzzled driver asks, 'Why do you buy them then?'

The old lady replied, 'We just love the chocolate around them.'