God, I miss Pakistan

[53fd]

This is year 14 away from Pakistan, & my 10th in the US. I don't know what is more painful: the fact that the 10 years of my childhood in Pakistan were the greatest, or how much Pakistan has 'apparently changed' in the next 14 years of my life. Maybe it had to do with childhood innocence, but I have never been happier in my life than the first 10 years I spent in Pakistan. I have been spellbound by Pakistan's "magic" from my childhood. It was the time when Pakistan had won the cricket World Cup in 1992, & everyone had a "natural high". You could hear patriotic songs everywhere, & people showed great pride in them, in getting 'consumed' by them. It was time of extreme happiness & joy, with very little sorrow or lows: it was magical. I think it is criminal for someone who grew up in the 90s, in an era of happiness & joy in Pakistan, to hate Pakistan today; for whatever reason. One had to grow up in those years in Pakistan to understand what I mean. Which is why I still have a lot of hope & optimism in Pakistan.

In the past 14 years, I have been visiting Pakistan almost every year, but I've missed out on the magic of actually living in Pakistan. Living here in America, & being separated from your love for 14 years is hard to explain. I feel like that despite being in America for so many years, my heart is still in Pakistan. I cannot explain to others what I feel about Pakistan, because I don't know what I feel about Pakistan a lot of times. For the most part, I am very optimistic about Pakistan. The few other times, I'm down & out, very confused. I want to live in Islamabad again, my first & (to be) last home. Living in America has sucked the life out of me, & I'd rather feel 'truly alive' living in Pakistan. I don't know how to explain it, but I feel the magic in Pakistan is still there: I want to go to the mountains in Gilgit-Baltistan, I want to enjoy the Thar Desert in Sindh, I want to enjoy the beauty of Naran-Kaghan, I want to go to Darra Adam Khel & check out the gun factory, I want to go to Balochistan & enjoy its beautiful landscape. I want to enjoy the rush of Karachi & Lahore, I want to enjoy the relaxed, easygoing lifestyle of Islamabad.

God, I miss Pakistan.

 

[Leader]

you seem very excited to come back to your homeland, but garmi bohat hai yar, akal thikanay aa jay gi...

 

[53fd]

you seem very excited to come back to your homeland, but garmi bohat hai yar, akal thikanay aa jay gi...

Mujhe loadshedding aur power outages se koi masla nahi he, mein koshish kar raha hoon keh mujhe naukri Pakistan mein mil jae. Koshish jaari hai, dua kijye keh sab kuch theek rahe... mujhe idher naukri karte hue do saal se upar ho gae hein (taqreeban teen saal), kaam mein idhar maza nahi aa raha...

 

[Roybot]

You should try and go more often. Sometimes I just book my ticket and fly to India abruptly. Don't even go to my village or city, just roam around Delhi for a day or two, and fly back.

 

[Dance]

Amazing post Bilal!

I know how you feel. I came to the U.S when I was in middle school and life has been good here, but I still miss Pakistan dearly! Most Pakistanis who live abroad but were raised in Pakistan would agree that whether you live in US, UK, China, Russia, etc theres still a part of you that wishes you can go back ASAP despite all the troubles in Pakistan because in the end of the day: it is your home, your country and you'll love it no matter what

 

[Ignited Mind]

You should try and go more often. Sometimes I just book my ticket and fly to India abruptly. Don't even go to my village or city, just roam around Delhi for a day or two, and fly back.

What do you do those 'one-two- days in Delhi?

I understand some exotic things are hard to find in OZ.

 

[53fd]

You should try and go more often. Sometimes I just book my ticket and fly to India abruptly. Don't even go to my village or city, just roam around Delhi for a day or two, and fly back.

I do go like once a year, sometimes twice a year if I'm lucky, but not for very long. A month tops. I don't know, my American friends here are so excited to go to Pakistan. But I want them to visit when I'm there, there is so much to show around Pakistan, & if one knows locals around (like I am), I am sure it will be one hell of an experience. So I have to get myself there first before asking others to join me. Which is why each & everyday I'm away from Pakistan is so frustrating, because I really want to show my friends around. I just miss feeling 'truly alive'. I feel 'third world countries' have so much 'life' in them than first world countries, which are pretty 'mechanical' in nature, if you know what I mean.

 

[Roybot]

I do go like once a year, sometimes twice a year if I'm lucky, but not for very long. A month tops. I don't know, my American friends here are so excited to go to Pakistan, as am I. But I want them to come when I'm there, there is so much to show around Pakistan, & if one knows locals around (like I am), I am sure it will be one hell of an experience. So I have to get myself there first before asking others to join me. Which is why each & everyday I'm away from Pakistan is so frustrating, because I really want to show my friends around. I just miss feeling 'truly alive'. I feel 'third world countries' have so much 'life' in them than first world countries, which are pretty 'mechanical' in nature, if you know what I mean.

Your passion and patriotism is contagious bro, you are making me home sick. This forum needs more people like you.

 

[Developereo]

Pakistan is a great place to live if you can tolerate the lack of basic public utilities. I don't think I could survive 15 hours/day without electricity or running water.

I also eventually realize why I left Pakistan in the first place -- it is no place for people without 'connections'.

 

[Hammy007]

dont come to pakistan until zerdari

aur bhai saab load shedding main GEENA AZAAB ho jata hai you are living in fool's paradise by imagining load shedding will not effect you

insaan pagal hojata hai saach main, after one month you will be transfered to mental hospital

aik hi tarana bajta hai brain main, abhi bijle aye hain tu 2 hrs baad chale jaye ge, phir itne hrs baad ye ge

 

[53fd]

Pakistan is a great place to live if you can tolerate the lack of basic public utilities. I don't think I could survive 15 hours/day without electricity or running water.

I also eventually realize why I left Pakistan in the first place -- it is no place for people without 'connections'.

You're right, but there are plenty of Pakistanis that manage to use electrical generators to solve the power outages, as well as many other things. There are plenty of people that live comfortably in Pakistan. For me personally, I am tired of living comfortably. I'd rather 'feel alive' than live comfortably. I feel it is a time for me to make differences in other people's lives, learn how to survive the scorching heat, trying to help people less fortunate than me. That is what gives true happiness to me. I'm sorry, I don't want to sound like a pretentious fool, but that's what I feel right now.

 

[53fd]

You should try and go more often. Sometimes I just book my ticket and fly to India abruptly. Don't even go to my village or city, just roam around Delhi for a day or two, and fly back.

You should go visit your village in UP (Ghazipur, right?). You'll have an amazing time consumed by nostalgia (if you grew up there that is).

 

[Developereo]

You're right, but there are plenty of Pakistanis that manage to use electrical generators to solve the power outages, as well as many other things. There are plenty of people that live comfortably in Pakistan. For me personally, I am tired of living comfortably. I'd rather 'feel alive' than live comfortably.

Yes, of course, people adapt and, if you can get past the problems, life is much better in Pakistan. I have cousins who don't get up till 10:30 and stay out late every night with friends. If you have money and connections, life is sweet in Pakistan.

I feel it is a time for me to make differences in other people's lives, learn how to survive the scorching heat, & trying to help people less fortunate than me. That is what gives true happiness to me.

You can also do that by earning money in US and donating to Pakistani organizations. Both Edhi Foundation and Imran Khan's charity have accounts in foreign countries. But I agree that it is much more satisfying to physically help out yourself.

 

[Leader]

Mujhe loadshedding aur power outages se koi masla nahi he, mein koshish kar raha hoon keh mujhe naukri Pakistan mein mil jae. Koshish jaari hai, dua kijye keh sab kuch theek rahe... mujhe idher naukri karte hue do saal se upar ho gae hein, kaam mein idhar maza nahi aa raha...

you will inshallah get career oriented job here as well and hopefully in a company of your desire.

 

[desioptimist]

If you have spent 14 years outside(and all your memory is of good pakistan) I dont think you will survive long there now. Unless of course you are from priviledged class, in which case your life could be marginally better there.