What makes a good daughter-in-law

[Sam.]

As females I can confirm, today's girls at some stage prefer their own places, maybe for a temporary basis they could adjust with in laws but after some stage you have to into account she wants her own privacy, dress in whatever she wants and roam free around the house with no worry. If you have bro/sis in laws there's a line of respect and moderation you have to be vary of.

Also once you have children, they grow up and want their own rooms and spaces etc.

Men want a modern wife with forward thinking, but haven't broaden their own minds. FYI: I'm no feminist but stating this hypocrisy

Describe modern?
If what i gather from your modernity then no i don't want that. Obviously i don't speak for all men.

In my humble opinion marriage is a relationship between two family and not two individuals. Two women are deeply part of men life
1)Mother
2)wife

You can not ask us to choose one.

 

[Hareeb]

You are a brave soul. If @Manama @Divergent1 read them ignoring the small fonts. You will have a busy couple of days

What I posted is a 101% truth.

 

[El Sidd]

Let them face the truth.

Sir you can't handle the truth...

I always wanted to try this line out....

Thanks for the opportunity

 

[Divergent]

Describe modern?
If what i gather from your modernity then no i don't want that. Obviously i don't speak for all men.

In my humble opinion marriage is a relationship between two family and not two individuals. Two women are deeply part of men life
1)Mother
2)wife

You can not ask us to choose one.

Mentality and broad minded. No one asked to choose.

 

[abdulbarijan]

There's a difference - a man is looking at another woman obviously she's not going to be happy about that, similarly to how a woman would look at another man and he wouldn't either.

Secondly, woman dressing in Western attire is no issue, similarly to how he does.On a same platform here.

Read my post again lady. I said, even if you THINK/ SUSPECT that we're looking towards a girl, and you find our gaze in the direction where by chance there is a girl, you go super saiyen in no time. Yes the differences can be chalked up, but the basic point still remains, your broad mindedness, your liberal-ness is only limited to the things that BENEFIT YOU. Case and point, even for empowered western women that can "do everything a man can do" and the feminist that "needs a man like a fish needs a bike" ... for some reason, when it comes to paying on dates, her equality turns to "Oh .. I think a man should pick up the check, I mean ... you should know how to treat a lady!" .. lets call out the hypocrisy of women too ... you aren't heavenly creatures that levitate above us all, equality goes both ways ..

Anyways, I would've appreciated an answer on the question I posed to you on my last post. i.e. If all the privacy needs where a woman can feel safe, can wear whatever the heck she wants etc. are joint family structures acceptable in those cases?

 

[Hareeb]

Sir you can't handle the truth...

I always wanted to try this line out....

Thanks for the opportunity

Pehle yeh batao tum mere sath ho ya unk?

 

[El Sidd]

Pehle yeh batao tum mere sath ho ya unk?

How dare you ask that to a bro?

You broke the code.

 

[Sam.]

Mentality and broad minded. No one asked to choose.

As females I can confirm, today's girls at some stage prefer their own places,

It's clearly to me what you stated from "your own place". How you point flash indicated girls want their own place instead of husband and wife want their own place.

No opinion of husband even considered ,this looks plain sexiest to me and by wanting your own place you want your hubby to leave their parents.
@abdulbarijan @Manama
Guys i can be wrong at reading her opinion over Internet so please excuse me if read incorrect and carry on with your debates.

 

[Divergent]

Read my post again lady. I said, even if you THINK/ SUSPECT that we're looking towards a girl, and you find our gaze in the direction where by chance there is a girl, you go super saiyen in no time. Yes the differences can be chalked up, but the basic point still remains, your broad mindedness, your liberal-ness is only limited to the things that BENEFIT YOU. Case and point, even for empowered western women that can "do everything a man can do" and the feminist that "needs a man like a bike needs a fish" ... for some reason, when it comes to paying on dates, her equality turns to "Oh .. I think a man should pick up the check, I mean ... you should know how to treat a lady!"

This isn't about Man vs Woman which seems to be your favourite topic and subject of the day any given time. This is about Women who get denied a right they are entitled to or looked at being 'disobedient' simply because they prefer having their own household. Note, I mentioned at some stage move out - which doesn't limit it to one or two weeks, but years also - I hope this settles the 'affordability' and wants 'mercedez' theory you've been parading.

It's clearly to me what you stated from "your own place". How you point flash indicated girls want their own place instead of husband and wife want their own place.

No opinion of husband even considered ,this looks plain sexiest to me and by wanting your own place you want your hubby to leave their parents.
@abdulbarijan @Manama
Guys i can be wrong at reading her opinion over Internet so please excuse me if read incorrect and carry on with your debates.

Yes you've read it wrong, I mean generally a Wife or girl prior to Marriage ideally would want THEIR own place with her Husband. This doesn't have to be with immediate effect but should be something in the pipe line be it a couple of years etc.

 

[abdulbarijan]

This isn't about Man vs Woman which seems to be your favourite topic and subject of the day any given time. This is about Women who get denied a right they are entitled to or looked at being 'disobedient' simply because they prefer having their own household. Note, I mentioned at some stage move out - which doesn't limit it to one or two weeks, but years also - I hope this settles the 'affordability' and wants 'mercedez' theory you've been parading.

LOL! ... so your not going to answer the question that puts your theory to the test. So I'll just ask again, your saying that there are a certain needs that girls have (privacy, freedom etc.) that need to be met.

That's perfectly fine with me ... my point still remains if those needs are met while being in a joint family ... does that solve the problem?

 

[Sam.]

Yes you've read it wrong, I mean generally a Wife or girl prior to Marriage ideally would want THEIR own place with her Husband. This doesn't have to be with immediate effect but should be something in the pipe line be it a couple of years etc.

Please educate me for general purpose. What if Husband doesn't want separate place and want to take care of his parents when they are older by living in the same home?

Also your generalization of all women is very wrong. I know tons of women and only half of them would want their own place so please don't speak for all women.

Other half would prefer to live In-Laws due to safety and when husband and wife go to job their children are in safe and loving hand. It's just one example which is in my mind.

 

[M. Sarmad]

Read my post again lady. I said, even if you THINK/ SUSPECT that we're looking towards a girl, and you find our gaze in the direction where by chance there is a girl, you go super saiyen in no time. Yes the differences can be chalked up, but the basic point still remains, your broad mindedness, your liberal-ness is only limited to the things that BENEFIT YOU. Case and point, even for empowered western women that can "do everything a man can do" and the feminist that "needs a man like a fish needs a bike" ... for some reason, when it comes to paying on dates, her equality turns to "Oh .. I think a man should pick up the check, I mean ... you should know how to treat a lady!" .. lets call out the hypocrisy of women too ... you aren't heavenly creatures that levitate above us all, equality goes both ways ..

Anyways, I would've appreciated an answer on the question I posed to you on my last post. i.e. If all the privacy needs where a woman can feel safe, can wear whatever the heck she wants etc. are joint family structures acceptable in those cases?

Let's be honest, mate. In our society, men are more hypocritical compared to women. We have double standards

 

[Hell hound]

Its time we move on from whatever culture stuff we inherited from our past with india.

and lose our identity to arabs no thanks.i am all in for all the positive changes that mixing of two cultures can bring but i don't see any thing positive coming out of arab culture and i will prefer my own Indus culture over outdated arab one any day.

nah joint family is just unreligious thats one of the main reasons to eradicate it.

i thought you were better than this but you like many other here is using the islam card and only partially applying it to situation so it just suits your narrative .how is joint family system unislamic.yes it is bit restrictive for females who practice parda and the males who don't want to interact with na mehrams but their is nothing unislamic about it you can easily compartmentalize your house and Islamicly live in a joint family.

 

[Divergent]

LOL! ... so your not going to answer the question that puts your theory to the test. So I'll just ask again, your saying that there are a certain needs that girls have (privacy, freedom etc.) that need to be met.

That's perfectly fine with me ... my point still remains if those needs are met while being in a joint family ... does that solve the problem?

How will those needs be met:
- Can she roam around in a night gown? - Shorts?
- Lay on the sofa?
- Have a Sunday lay in? Or does she have to be up at 7am making breakfast for the rest of the household?


Why do you think most girls treat their parents house as a holiday resort?

Let's be honest, mate. In our society, men are more hypocritical compared to women. We have double standards

Thank you.

 

[Deidara]

I thought this thread was strange from a Pakistani point of view but now I saw it was started by an Indian so I thought it makes sense. Cause marriage is largely irrelevant in Pakistan now. The spring is well over till that time arises.