What makes a good daughter-in-law

[Verve]

If she does than from what i know Islamically you have to but looking at our society i would say we should come at a compromise

Please explain in bold. Does what exactly?

If she wants to move out, is that what you meant?

 

[Zibago]

Please explain in bold. Does what exactly?

I was listening to a sermon by Tarik Jameel he said a Husband has to provide a different residence to his wife

If she wants to move out, is that what you meant?

Yep

 

[gayMo]

a good husband?

 

[Divergent]

I think this is the last question anybody should be asking, because typically the daughter-in-law leaves her home for a new one. In essence, she is the one that has to struggle the most. So the questions that should take preference is .. what makes a good husband, what makes a good father-in-law, mother-in-law, brother-in-law and sister-in-law followed by what makes a good wifey and then we can talk about her role as a daughter-in-law ..

I'll give you this 100%

 

[Zibago]

And even if you look it from a non religious perspective why should she serve your parents or siblings?

 

[Verve]

I was listening to a sermon by Tarik Jameel he said a Husband has to provide a different residence to his wife

Yep

'Awal' is what Quran says about Husband-Wife relationship and 'Azeem' for Children-Parents relationship.

If the son can afford to have a separate residence for his wife and still provide care for his parents, then yeah. But if he can't afford, then he should not separate. It is as simple as that. A wife has rights (Awal - lots of rights!) but she has no right above than that of a mother who carried the child for 9 months and so on and on and on! She can't force her husband to give up care for his parents.

We, muslims, are obliged to care for parents who are non-muslim!!! This is how Azeem this relationship is.

 

[RayOfLight]

when a girl seriously started thinking about being a good daughter in law instead of searching or praying for good mother-in-law.. she won half of the battle already..

 

[Divergent]

Females get it hard as it is. Guys need to be more supportive. Every bird leaves it nest to build a new home.

 

[Zibago]

If the son can afford to have a separate residence for his wife and still provide care for his parents, then yeah. But if he can't afford, then he should not separate. It is as simple as that. A wife has rights (Awal - lots of rights!) but she has no right above than that of a mother who carried the child for 9 months and so on and on and on! She can't force her husband to give up care for his parents.

In that scenario he has to provide a separate portion or room for the wife still taking care of his parents is HIS responsibility

We, muslims, are obliged to care for parents who are non-muslim!!! This is how Azeem this relationship is.

We, muslims, are obliged to care for our parents who are non-muslim!!! This is how Azeem this relationship is

 

[Verve]

In that scenario he has to provide a separate portion or room for the wife still taking care of his parents is HIS responsibility

Yes. If she wants to manage her room and cook for only herself and her husband then by all means. Quite pathetic and selfish that would be but yeah under the 'no obligation' clause her selfish behaviour would be something her (non-forcing) husband should love and praise her for, yes!? Would such behaviour increase love and respect or diminish it?

We, muslims, are obliged to care for our parents who are non-muslim!!! This is how Azeem this relationship is

'Our' is given and understood.

 

[Zibago]

Yes. If she wants to manage her room and cook for only herself and her husband then by all means. Quite pathetic and selfish that would be but yeah under the 'no obligation' clause her selfish behaviour would be something her (non-forcing) husband should love and praise her for, yes!? Would such behaviour increase love and respect or diminish it?

Well she married you not your family she has a right to say no it would be wrong to get angry over that

'Our' is given and understood.

When my parents are old they are my responsibility in your case your and your siblings

 

[Verve]

What people need to understand is that whatever we should do should be for Allah and to please him only.

Selfish people don't do for Allah.

And that applies to those men too who don't allow their wives to care for her parents. It's not just one sided.

Well she married you not your family she has a right to say no it would be wrong to get angry over that

She has NO RIGHT to stop the man caring for his parents.

 

[Zibago]

She has NO RIGHT to stop the man caring for his parents.

HE can and should take care of them she can do that but she is under no obligations

 

[Verve]

HE can and should take care of them she can do that but she is under no obligations

I'm saying no different (read posts again if you need to) so don't know why you are banging on about it.

Those who do it for Allah will have their reward. Same goes for son-in-laws.

HE can and should take care of them she can do that but she is under no obligations

I'm saying no different (read posts again if you need to) so don't know why you are banging on about it.

Those who do it for Allah will have their reward. Same goes for son-in-laws.

 

[abdulbarijan]

Females get it hard as it is. Guys need to be more supportive. Every bird leaves it nest to build a new home.

Guys have it the worst because most of us realize the struggle your going through to settle in a new home and getting used to your new life, and we wanna help and be supportive and caring and all that stuff. But the biggest problem is this power struggle between the mother in law and daughter in law, and as a guy, your trying to balance your relationship with your mum and your wifey. One wrong move and it's three days without a word or seven nights on the couch.