Stupid and funny from all over the world - II

[Kloitra]

 

[Myth_buster_1]

Typical Indian mentality, always depicts India as heaven on earth when in reality its just a giant SLUM with massive economy and alot of poor hungry people.

 

[sanddy]

Typical Indian mentality, always depicts India as heaven on earth when in reality its just a giant SLUM with massive economy and alot of poor hungry people.

Whatever makes you happy my friend and ya enjoy your land of pure .

 

[Myth_buster_1]

Whatever makes you happy my friend and ya enjoy your land of pure .

Ya same to you too.

 

[Kloitra]

 

[Thorough Pro]

Is Bchod ki gaf mein tobasco ki bottle dal dun to mchod tippa kha kar seeda asman per bhee ja sakta hai.

perfectly elastic collision

 

[Kloitra]

By the Court Clerk: Please repeat after me, "I swear by Almighty God ..."

By the Witness: I swear by Almighty God.

Clerk: That the evidence that I give ...

Witness: That's right.

Clerk: Repeat it.

Witness: Repeat it.

Clerk: No! Repeat what I said.

Witness: What you said when?

Clerk: That the evidence that I give ...

Witness: That the evidence that I give.

Clerk: Shall be the truth and ...

Witness: It will, and nothing but the truth!

Clerk: Please. Just repeat after me, "Shall be the truth and ..."

Witness: I'm not a scholar, you know.

Clerk: We can appreciate that. Just repeat after me, "Shall be the truth and ..."

Witness: Shall be the truth and.

Clerk: Say, "Nothing ..."

Witness: Okay. [Witness remains silent]

Clerk: No! Don't say nothing. Say, "Nothing but the truth ..."

Witness: Yes.

Clerk: Can't you say, "Nothing but the truth ...?"

Witness: Yes.


Clerk: Well? ... Do so.

Witness: You're confusing me.

Clerk: Just say, "Nothing but the truth ..."

Witness: Is that all?

Clerk: Yes.

Witness: Okay. I understand.

Clerk: Then say it.

Witness: What?

Clerk: "Nothing but the truth ..."

Witness: But I do! That's just it.

Clerk: You must say, "Nothing but the truth ..."

Witness: I will say nothing but the truth!

Clerk: Please, just repeat these four words "Nothing," "But," "The" "Truth."

Witness: What? You mean, like, now?

Clerk: Yes! Now. Please. Just say those four words.

Witness: "Nothing. But. The. Truth"

Clerk: Thank you.

Witness: I'm just not a scholar you know.

 

[Kloitra]

The following are actual statements placed on insurance forms where the car's driver attempted to summarize the details of their accident in the fewest words possible.

• Coming home I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree I don't have.

• The other car collided with mine without giving any warning of its intentions.

• I thought the window was down, but I found out it was up when I put my head through it.

• A truck backed through my windshield and into my wife's face.

• A pedestrian hit me and went under my car.

• The guy was all over the road. I had to swerve a number of times before I hit him.

• I pulled away from the side of the road, glaced at my mother-in-law, and headed over an embankment.

• In my attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone poll.

• I had been shopping for plants all day and was on my way home. As I reached an intersection, a hedge sprang up, obscuring my vision and I did not see the other car.

• I had been driving for 40 years when I fell asleep at the wheel and had an accident.

• The pedestrian had no idea which way to run, so I ran over him.

• I was on my way to the doctor with rear end trouble when my universal joint gave way causing me to have an accident.

• As I approached an intersection a sign suddenly appeared in a place where no stop sign had ever appeared before. I was unable to stop in time to avoid the accident.

• To avoid hitting the bumper of the car in front, I struck the pedestrian.

• My car was legally parked as it backed into the other vehicle.

• I told the police that I was not injured, but upon removing my hat, found that I had a fractured skull.

• I saw a slow moving, sad faced old gentleman as he bounced off the roof of my car.

• The indirect cause of the accident was a little guy in a small car with a big mouth.

• I was thrown from my car as it left the road. I was later found in a ditch by some stray cows.

• The telephone pole was approaching. I was attempting to swerve out of its way when it struck the front of my car.

 

[Thorough Pro]

agar teefay bchod ka mun ballot box ho aur mera lun vote, to roz is mchod ko 10 dafa vote dalun

@Marshmallow is going to vote for MQM !

 

[Jango]

 

[Mujahid]

https://www.facebook.com/video.php?v=165083962924

 

[Kloitra]

 

[Kloitra]

 

[Kloitra]

 

[Kloitra]