jaibi
SENIOR MODERATOR
- Joined
- Nov 15, 2012
- Messages
- 3,459
- Reaction score
- 108
- Country
- Location
Eid on the front-lines: the best Eid I ever had
Every day I was learning something new and there was not much time to incorporate that knowledge as Eid was coming. It was two days ago when I got the call from a senior asking me if it was possible for me to stay because another officer had a small family emergency and hailed from a region much further away from me. I had experienced other officers, much senior to me being very liberal in their support for someone in need and it was something I could not refuse.
I called home and told them I would not be able to make it this Eid and to my surprise my father was enthusiastic saying, ‘Do your job, son, we’re proud of you!’
Desi families aren’t supposed to be like that.
A free formation
The entire world changes when you’re the senior most officer in the formation. I was well liked so even the NCOs were quite happy that it was me who was staying back.
The vast empty offices and roads which we weren’t allowed to traverse felt extremely powerful to move around on.
It was quite an exhilarating experience especially signing papers in place of men much senior to me. Trust me now I know why some bureaucrats go crazy; I never thought just a sign could feel so empowering.
Experiencing your 2IC
Go to any office, any mechanic shop, any restaurant or dhaba and you’ll experience the 2IC the second man in-charge. He’s the one most people will dread because even though you wield authority he is the one who boasts about it the most. I had the fortune of having a much nicer junior be my second in-charge.
As documents came for signing, calls to be made, decisions to be done; he’d always look at my hand and seeing it free of a cigarette he’d readily offer me my favorite brand.
Prompt, ‘Sir ji, please.’ As he lit the lighter.
Being the boss is good.
Meaning of the boss
It was the evening and I got a call, ‘sir, tomorrow prayer timings have been issued, I shall send a car and I’ve prepared some points for you.’
Points for me?
After Eid prayers I was supposed to talk to the troops. I was as prepared as you are for your first board examinations. I read the paper like a robot not knowing what else to do but I saw everyone looking at me. I felt like saying something.
‘You know, I’ve never left my home city for more than a few days before my service. People around me used to say that people from each region are quite different in one way or another but I think they never really travelled either. As I’ve been with all of you for the few days I look around and I honestly don’t see a Sindhi, Punjabi, Balochi, Saraiki, Gilgati or Pakhtun; yet at the same time I see all of you. I’ve learned your beautiful languages, heard about your villages, seen the pictures of your children, wives and families. All so different but all so same at the same time. I cannot thank you enough for this experience; I’ve never felt this welcome from anywhere else. I feel at home at each region and I truly feel that I belong to a big family. So, not as your officer but as your fellow citizen, I thank each and every one of you for not making me miss home and giving me a new family of brothers! Eid Mubarak my dearest brothers! I promise to always keep this feeling in my heart and be the man all of you expect me to be and help you all to be the men you aspire to be! Pakistan Zindabad!’
This was followed by cheerful shouts and praises to Allah.
A BBQ never to miss
The fresh meat was prepared and served in the evening as we sat around a grand fire, it was done in the traditional ways of Punjabi grandiosity, Sindhi flavors, Balochi techniques and Pakhtun zeal. I tasted food from all over Pakistan by best cooks from each region making them. My mouth still waters.
Along with that it is of course mandatory to have tea and my vice: smokes.
It was dark now and in that fire-lit environment with the clearest of skies I had many troops open up about the scars they’d carried. The friends they’d lost. The struggles of their families and the isolation sometimes they felt.
I did my best to hear everyone and tell people who wanted privacy that we’ll schedule something.
It was at this moment that I realized how privileged I have been. Majority of my friends wanted to go to the West, they wanted to go to better universities, better jobs, move to better cars, get better spouses everything was arched on this innate dissatisfaction of where they were.
In my youth, so was I but I don’t think you age by time but by experience. This was my time to grow.
I had been extremely fortunate to study and all the troubles of my life felt minuscule in front of theirs. I felt like I had never been grateful before as I felt so right now.
I’ve never been a fan of feeling guilt or gratitude or much of anything unless you can use it to fuel something in you. I felt that right now, I may not have been the best, or the most qualified but I was the only one here. It was never about being the best as much of society always seems to tell you but doing your best!
Finding meaning
It was like an Eurika moment for me. This seemed so natural; in my mind I started developing therapeutic plans for each and every one who came to talk to me. Even if I have a few seconds with them, I must leave them better than they came in. They see me as a leader and that does not mean power but responsibility. I am not older than most of them, I am not fitter than most of them, I am not better trained that most of them but I am entrusted with more responsibility.
My gratefulness will be to be the best officer I can be and my primary role is that to be a military psychologist. I will do my best from here onward.
That feeling has never left me. In the tribulations of life that I faced; I always go back to the best Eid I have ever had.
I hope this little personal piece finds you well and helps you in your times of need.
Every day I was learning something new and there was not much time to incorporate that knowledge as Eid was coming. It was two days ago when I got the call from a senior asking me if it was possible for me to stay because another officer had a small family emergency and hailed from a region much further away from me. I had experienced other officers, much senior to me being very liberal in their support for someone in need and it was something I could not refuse.
I called home and told them I would not be able to make it this Eid and to my surprise my father was enthusiastic saying, ‘Do your job, son, we’re proud of you!’
Desi families aren’t supposed to be like that.
A free formation
The entire world changes when you’re the senior most officer in the formation. I was well liked so even the NCOs were quite happy that it was me who was staying back.
The vast empty offices and roads which we weren’t allowed to traverse felt extremely powerful to move around on.
It was quite an exhilarating experience especially signing papers in place of men much senior to me. Trust me now I know why some bureaucrats go crazy; I never thought just a sign could feel so empowering.
Experiencing your 2IC
Go to any office, any mechanic shop, any restaurant or dhaba and you’ll experience the 2IC the second man in-charge. He’s the one most people will dread because even though you wield authority he is the one who boasts about it the most. I had the fortune of having a much nicer junior be my second in-charge.
As documents came for signing, calls to be made, decisions to be done; he’d always look at my hand and seeing it free of a cigarette he’d readily offer me my favorite brand.
Prompt, ‘Sir ji, please.’ As he lit the lighter.
Being the boss is good.
Meaning of the boss
It was the evening and I got a call, ‘sir, tomorrow prayer timings have been issued, I shall send a car and I’ve prepared some points for you.’
Points for me?
After Eid prayers I was supposed to talk to the troops. I was as prepared as you are for your first board examinations. I read the paper like a robot not knowing what else to do but I saw everyone looking at me. I felt like saying something.
‘You know, I’ve never left my home city for more than a few days before my service. People around me used to say that people from each region are quite different in one way or another but I think they never really travelled either. As I’ve been with all of you for the few days I look around and I honestly don’t see a Sindhi, Punjabi, Balochi, Saraiki, Gilgati or Pakhtun; yet at the same time I see all of you. I’ve learned your beautiful languages, heard about your villages, seen the pictures of your children, wives and families. All so different but all so same at the same time. I cannot thank you enough for this experience; I’ve never felt this welcome from anywhere else. I feel at home at each region and I truly feel that I belong to a big family. So, not as your officer but as your fellow citizen, I thank each and every one of you for not making me miss home and giving me a new family of brothers! Eid Mubarak my dearest brothers! I promise to always keep this feeling in my heart and be the man all of you expect me to be and help you all to be the men you aspire to be! Pakistan Zindabad!’
This was followed by cheerful shouts and praises to Allah.
A BBQ never to miss
The fresh meat was prepared and served in the evening as we sat around a grand fire, it was done in the traditional ways of Punjabi grandiosity, Sindhi flavors, Balochi techniques and Pakhtun zeal. I tasted food from all over Pakistan by best cooks from each region making them. My mouth still waters.
Along with that it is of course mandatory to have tea and my vice: smokes.
It was dark now and in that fire-lit environment with the clearest of skies I had many troops open up about the scars they’d carried. The friends they’d lost. The struggles of their families and the isolation sometimes they felt.
I did my best to hear everyone and tell people who wanted privacy that we’ll schedule something.
It was at this moment that I realized how privileged I have been. Majority of my friends wanted to go to the West, they wanted to go to better universities, better jobs, move to better cars, get better spouses everything was arched on this innate dissatisfaction of where they were.
In my youth, so was I but I don’t think you age by time but by experience. This was my time to grow.
I had been extremely fortunate to study and all the troubles of my life felt minuscule in front of theirs. I felt like I had never been grateful before as I felt so right now.
I’ve never been a fan of feeling guilt or gratitude or much of anything unless you can use it to fuel something in you. I felt that right now, I may not have been the best, or the most qualified but I was the only one here. It was never about being the best as much of society always seems to tell you but doing your best!
Finding meaning
It was like an Eurika moment for me. This seemed so natural; in my mind I started developing therapeutic plans for each and every one who came to talk to me. Even if I have a few seconds with them, I must leave them better than they came in. They see me as a leader and that does not mean power but responsibility. I am not older than most of them, I am not fitter than most of them, I am not better trained that most of them but I am entrusted with more responsibility.
My gratefulness will be to be the best officer I can be and my primary role is that to be a military psychologist. I will do my best from here onward.
That feeling has never left me. In the tribulations of life that I faced; I always go back to the best Eid I have ever had.
I hope this little personal piece finds you well and helps you in your times of need.
