McCain Urges Military Strikes Against FIFA

[vostok]

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report) – Calling the Obama Administration’s actions against the soccer organization “weak and ineffective,” Senator John McCain on Thursday proposed military action to “dismantle and destroy FIFA once and for all.”

“These are people who only understand one thing: force,” McCain said on the floor of the United States Senate. “We must make FIFA taste the vengeful might and fury of the United States military.”

McCain said that he was “completely unimpressed” by the Department of Justice’s arrests of several top FIFA lieutenants this week, calling the action “the kind of Band-Aid solution that this Administration, sadly, has become famous for.”

“Rounding up a few flunkies in a hotel is meaningless when the leader of FIFAremains at large,” he said. “I will follow Sepp Blatter to the gates of Hell.”

McCain requested a four-billion-dollar aid package for moderate elements within global soccer, and said that the United States should be prepared to put boots on the ground in Switzerland.

Calling the use of force against FIFA “long overdue,” he placed the blame for the group’s alarming growth squarely on the shoulders of the White House. “Barack Obama created FIFA,” he said.
McCain Urges Military Strikes Against FIFA - The New Yorker
I know that McCain - shell-shocked clown. But now the United States assumed the right in its sole discretion to intervene in sports organizations?
What's wrong with you, people?

 

[Transhumanist]

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report) – Calling the Obama Administration’s actions against the soccer organization “weak and ineffective,” Senator John McCain on Thursday proposed military action to “dismantle and destroy FIFA once and for all.”

“These are people who only understand one thing: force,” McCain said on the floor of the United States Senate. “We must make FIFA taste the vengeful might and fury of the United States military.”

McCain said that he was “completely unimpressed” by the Department of Justice’s arrests of several top FIFA lieutenants this week, calling the action “the kind of Band-Aid solution that this Administration, sadly, has become famous for.”

“Rounding up a few flunkies in a hotel is meaningless when the leader of FIFAremains at large,” he said. “I will follow Sepp Blatter to the gates of Hell.”

McCain requested a four-billion-dollar aid package for moderate elements within global soccer, and said that the United States should be prepared to put boots on the ground in Switzerland.

Calling the use of force against FIFA “long overdue,” he placed the blame for the group’s alarming growth squarely on the shoulders of the White House. “Barack Obama created FIFA,” he said.
McCain Urges Military Strikes Against FIFA - The New Yorker
I know that McCain - shell-shocked clown. But now the United States assumed the right in its sole discretion to intervene in sports organizations?
What's wrong with you, people?

Dude, it's satire. About the author:

Andy Borowitz is a New York Times best-selling author and a comedian who has written for The New Yorker since 1998. He writes the Borowitz Report for newyorker.com.

The bottom of the article even has an offer to:

Get news satire from The Borowtiz Report delivered to your inbox.

This "news" is only being carried by the likes of Fnews - Fake News:

McCain Urges Military Strikes Against FIFA - Fnews

McCain Urges Military Strikes Against FIFA - Fake trendolizer

 

[大汉奸柳传志]

Disrespectful!!!

 

[I.R.A]

What did I just read?

 

[Styx]

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report) – Calling the Obama Administration’s actions against the soccer organization “weak and ineffective,” Senator John McCain on Thursday proposed military action to “dismantle and destroy FIFA once and for all.”

“These are people who only understand one thing: force,” McCain said on the floor of the United States Senate. “We must make FIFA taste the vengeful might and fury of the United States military.”

McCain said that he was “completely unimpressed” by the Department of Justice’s arrests of several top FIFA lieutenants this week, calling the action “the kind of Band-Aid solution that this Administration, sadly, has become famous for.”

“Rounding up a few flunkies in a hotel is meaningless when the leader of FIFAremains at large,” he said. “I will follow Sepp Blatter to the gates of Hell.”

McCain requested a four-billion-dollar aid package for moderate elements within global soccer, and said that the United States should be prepared to put boots on the ground in Switzerland.

Calling the use of force against FIFA “long overdue,” he placed the blame for the group’s alarming growth squarely on the shoulders of the White House. “Barack Obama created FIFA,” he said.
McCain Urges Military Strikes Against FIFA - The New Yorker
I know that McCain - shell-shocked clown. But now the United States assumed the right in its sole discretion to intervene in sports organizations?
What's wrong with you, people?

oh dear

I fully support the struggle of the donbass people but this was so obviously sattire

vodka much ?

 

[jerry_tan]

gullible poster

 

[Shan-e-ibrahim]

I want to fart on his face.

 

[Zabaniyah]

LOL...that was funny.

Americans suck at football anyways. To call it 'soccer' is blasphemous.

 

[vostok]

I understand, this is satire. But the Americans have just arrested a top leadership of FIFA.
This is likely related to the fact that the 2018 World Cup will be held in Russia.

 

[Styx]

I understand, this is satire. But the Americans have just arrested a top leadership of FIFA.
This is likely related to the fact that the 2018 World Cup will be held in Russia.

the saker blogged about it, should have posted this one instead: AngloZionists 1 : World 0 – final score? | The Vineyard of the Saker

 

[Steve781]

Your queen still trade slaves and opium?

Not any more. Just accept that FIFA will no longer be an oligarchs' play thing.

 

[jhungary]

How this vostok guy can become a TT is really beyond me.......

But sometime even stupidity have its own limit.

And yes, we arrest a FIFA official because the next world cup will be held at Russia, which was decided over 8 years ago. And you don't want to see how we treated the IOC rep when they awarded the 2008 Olympic to Beijing, we executed him, heh happy?.

 

[vostok]

Not any more. Just accept that FIFA will no longer be an oligarchs' play thing.

Interesting coincidence. Recently someone said that Russia should be deprived of the right to host the championship. And then (why would it?) several top leaders of FIFA were kidnapped by America ...
The world is full of wonderful coincidences.
I hope that FIFA President have enough strong will to withstand the pressure.

 

[Steve781]

Interesting coincidence. Recently someone said that Russia should be deprived of the right to host the championship. And then (why would it?) several top leaders of FIFA were kidnapped by America ...
The world is full of wonderful coincidences.
I hope that FIFA President have enough strong will to withstand the pressure.

Doesn't matter even if it was about Russia. FIFA is run by crooks and everybody knows it.

 

[vostok]

Doesn't matter even if it was about Russia. FIFA is run by crooks and everybody knows it.

I also know this. Frankly, I do not care. Instead this crooks they will put other crooks.
I care about one thing - so they not to cancel the Championship in Russia.