`Good news for New York City. New York City will now be spending $8 million to get
rid of the rats here in New York City because there are like 30 million rats here in New
York City...Not only are these rats brazen, they have gotten to be huge. They are big,
strapping rats. Over the weekend, on Sunday in Central Park, I saw one of them catch a
frisbee in its mouth.''
``The city is launching an anti-rat campaign -- $8 million dollars they're going to spend
on eradicating the rats and it's going to begin in October, which I think is nice because by
then most of the rats should be back from the Hamptons.''
``Last night, one of the rats held up a 7-Eleven, looked right into the security camera
and laughed.''
``I think that this rat campaign has already got the rats panicking. This morning, I'm
coming to work, I see a rat outside the Ed Sullivan Theater building teasing the hair on his
tail, trying to make himself look like a squirrel.''
``These rats here in New York City, because they've been allowed to run free for the
last 20-30 years, these rats have become brazen. Last night, across the street, I see a rat
getting a lap dance.''
``New York City has declared war against rats. The reason, between you and me, New
York City is having so much trouble getting rid of the rats, as soon as they round up a rat,
the rat will hire a really slick attorney and then bang! He's right back out on the street.''
``The real problem with the rats...-they now are multiplying faster than Anthony
Quinn.''