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Pakistan vs England 2012 series (Cricket assault in Deserts of U.A.E)

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تعریف-وہی-جو-دشمن-کرے-ٹیم-پاکستان
 
woh sirf tanz kar rahe hain apni team ko!
 
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January 21, 2012

The Long Handle
Posted by Andrew Hughes


A visit to Saeed's supermarket of spin


Ian Bell practises the flummoxed batsman look for the next time he meets Ajmal © Getty Images

Thursday, 19th January

As a fan of the three-day game, it was great to see England doing their bit to promote one of cricket’s classic formats. There were no wacky declarations in their homage to 1980s county cricket, but they did bring on Jonathan Trott for some joke bowling and they managed to wrap the whole thing up by the third evening. Well done, chaps.

Saeed Ajmal was their nemesis, a smiling purveyor of psychological cricket warfare and cunningly fashioned straightish ones that kind of do a little bit. On the face of it, there doesn’t appear to be much devil in the Ajmal style. If he sold his deliveries in a high street shop, the customers would soon be complaining about the lack of choice.

“Saeed, where are the teesras you said you were getting in? And these doosras here look very similar to your offbreaks over there.”

“Ah,” he would reply, with a grin, “But if you look very closely, you can see that one bends slightly this way, and one bends slightly that way.”

And it’s true. Of course, Ian Bell’s visit to Saeed’s Supermarket of Spin would end after a couple of minutes of confused browsing, with the wee fella running out, screaming, “I don’t know which one to choose! I don’t know which one to choose!”

Bell is, remember, England’s officially nominated “best player of spin”, which admittedly isn’t a great claim to fame, a bit like being the tallest of the seven dwarves or the least unpleasant Republican presidential hopeful, but still, if anyone could handle Saeed, it was going to be Ian.

That didn’t work out too well and now England’s only hope of leaving the Middle East with any semblance of dignity lies in their batsmen finding a way to identify the doosra, preferably before it hits their pad. At the moment, I doubt they’d spot it even if the ICC were to introduce a new rule requiring the umpire to hold up a card stating “Warning: Doosra!” at the appropriate moment.

They will though have some behind-the-scenes help. I don’t mean Merlin the magical bowling machine. I’m talking about the Sky commentators. We should never forget one of the fundamental principles of modern cricket, known as Murali’s Law, which states that the extent to which a spin bowler’s action is a problem is directly related to the number of opponents he has dismissed in the current series.

We have already heard Bob Willis talking ominously about long sleeves and crooked elbows and ahead of the second Test, Sky are working on a giant rubber protractor which Nasser Hussain will hold up in front of the camera every time Saeed bowls in order to give us regular readouts on his angle of arm-bend. Expect more public tastings of vintage Chateau Sour as the series goes on.

Pakistan fans, meanwhile, were having a fantastic time, watching a match in which their team started off well, carried on doing well and utterly refused to throw it away in the most painful way possible right at the end. And in between watching the clatter of English wickets, there was the added entertainment of goading Ian Botham via Twitter, a pastime which obviously I could not possibly endorse.

This metamorphosis from embarrassing shambles to casual success would be remarkable for most teams, but for Pakistan, it’s just another 12 months. With their opponents in disarray, the series is theirs for the taking. Providing they don’t do anything silly…

hilarious!!!
 
I Think right now Pakistan is favourite Team But England Can Come Back in This Series So Be Attentive Pakistani Team should Struggle for Win
 
Dubai defeat disaster: the positivesIt hasn't all been all terrible for England in the UAE so far, you know


Alan Tyers

January 23, 2012


Monty Panesar cunningly deploys a cricket ball on his fretboard during the semi-finals of the World Air-Bass Guitar Championship



If the Andrew Strauss and Andrew Flower era has been characterised by one thing, it has been only ever dropping bowlers no matter how badly the team bat.

Sorry, hang on. If the Andrew Strauss and Andrew Flower era has been characterised by two things, it has been only ever dropping bowlers, no matter how badly the team bats; and chucking in one horror performance per series.

No, wait. If the Andrew Strauss and Andrew Flower era has been characterised by three things, it has been only ever dropping bowlers, no matter how badly the team bats; chucking in one horror performance per series; and taking the positives from a situation.

So yes. The positives. Despite the disrespectful sniggering from the peanut gallery (India, Australia), there were a lot of encouraging developments to take away from the Dubai disaster.

Firstly, the match brought the work of Bob Willis to a wider audience. British-based cricket fans have enjoyed many years of Bob's brilliantly grumpy "heads will roll" style of punditry, and we are more than happy to share this national treasure. Bob makes it clear that he thinks the current generation of cricketers are, without exception, a disgrace and should be hanged and flogged in the town square, which they would be if it weren't for the meddling interventions of the PC brigade. The fire-and-brimstone work of Willis is a branch of the entertainment industry and should be taken on these terms.

His insistence that spinners like Saeed Ajmal should be made to bowl in a vest was genius: few international sporting spectacles would not be improved by making the participants do it in their underwear, like schoolboys who have forgotten their PE kit. Bob unquestionably contributes to the gaiety of nations, not that he would thank you for saying so, and as such should be enjoyed worldwide. No need to get irate, just enjoy it as it is. You're welcome.

Secondly, Pakistan were brilliant and fantastic to watch, proving once again that they can be an irresistible force in any cricket match that they are actually trying to win. Also, nobody has been arrested, spoken to by the police, or even caught out in a tabloid sting operation at the time of writing in this series. This is real progress.

Thirdly, a more acceptable Akmal brother has been inserted into the team. If we must have an Akmal, let's at least have one of the competent ones.

Fourthly, because England batted so badly, they may have to change their bowling line-up, which might well mean a chance for Monty Panesar. Any chance to see Monty is always a joy; as long as you don't have to listen to him talk.

Fifthly, by suddenly realising that they aren't so sure about the DRS after all, England can now find some common ground with their antagonists in the BCCI. If England can win the hearts and minds of cricket's most powerful body, perhaps using their new-found mistrust of technology as an ice-breaker, India might even let them carry on playing Test cricket for a few more years.

And finally, the spectacle of England getting gubbed in subcontinent-style conditions by a mystery spinner was an enjoyable stroll down memory lane. It gave fans of teams worldwide a chance to laugh once again at the outraged, spluttering ineptitude of the former colonial masters; and reminded England fans of the exquisite misery of the 1990s. At least it can never be that bad again: not while there's only three Tests in series, thank heavens.

Read CrickiLeaks: The Secret Ashes Diaries, by Tyers and Beach
 
^^^

I like the third, fourth and fifth points. Good read.
 
Interesting news

it is reported by geo that during the training england team had prior to 2nd test match (which btw is starting tomorrow) they called upon all the local guys who can ball off spin and continuously asked them to ball on their pads where the ajmal usually balls ...lol freaking

even the local guys were laughing and at the end those guys infact couple of them were interviewed by geo who were also able to speak urdu...and those guys were making the mockery of english team saying they are really afraid of ajmal ...lol
 
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