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Stupid & Funny from Around the World :Continued

Wife can ‘lightly kick’ husband’s b*lls in self-defense, impartial CII suggests
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May 27, 2016
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ISLAMABAD: The recently proposed points by Council of Islamic Ideology (CII) on Women Protection Bill have created uproar on social media following suggestions that a husband can “lightly beat” his wife. But few points in wives’ favour have completely been missed by the media. Maulana Sheerani contacted Khabaristan Times and cleared his feminist position.

Here is the list of missed points which have been given to Khabaristan Times by Maulana Sheerani.

(i) Wife can lightly kick husband’s balls.

“When a husband crosses his limit of lightly beating the wife, she can kick his balls in defense. It should be noted here that the intensity of kick should not be hard enough to take the husband’s life.”

(ii) Husband cannot have circumcision without wife’s approval.

“Equating with a point where a woman cannot use contraception without the husband’s approval, CII balances it out by saying that parents would not circumcise their children in early age. It would be the right of a wife to decide whether male should be circumcised or not.”

(iii) Masturbation will be considered a murder.

“As abortion will be considered murder after 120 days, masturbation will also be classified as murder because both take lives. For making this effective, Maulana Sheerani will himself design and install a chip in males’ bodies which would help us track who is masturbating.”

(iv) Men should not be advertised in condom ads.

“Upholding CII impartial credibility, males would be banned to star in condom ads. Instead, chimpanzees can be used for this purpose because they share 90 per cent human DNA and organs.”

Maulana Sheerani labeled mainstream media as “misogynistic” for purposely ignoring abovementioned points. He also certified Khabaristan Times a “Halal Media” for maintaining the spirit of true journalism.


Wife can ‘lightly kick’ husband’s b*lls in self-defense, i
 
.
Wife can ‘lightly kick’ husband’s b*lls in self-defense, impartial CII suggests
1
Featured, National
May 27, 2016
A+A-
EMAILPRINT

CII.jpg


ISLAMABAD: The recently proposed points by Council of Islamic Ideology (CII) on Women Protection Bill have created uproar on social media following suggestions that a husband can “lightly beat” his wife. But few points in wives’ favour have completely been missed by the media. Maulana Sheerani contacted Khabaristan Times and cleared his feminist position.

Here is the list of missed points which have been given to Khabaristan Times by Maulana Sheerani.

(i) Wife can lightly kick husband’s balls.

“When a husband crosses his limit of lightly beating the wife, she can kick his balls in defense. It should be noted here that the intensity of kick should not be hard enough to take the husband’s life.”

(ii) Husband cannot have circumcision without wife’s approval.

“Equating with a point where a woman cannot use contraception without the husband’s approval, CII balances it out by saying that parents would not circumcise their children in early age. It would be the right of a wife to decide whether male should be circumcised or not.”

(iii) Masturbation will be considered a murder.

“As abortion will be considered murder after 120 days, masturbation will also be classified as murder because both take lives. For making this effective, Maulana Sheerani will himself design and install a chip in males’ bodies which would help us track who is masturbating.”

(iv) Men should not be advertised in condom ads.

“Upholding CII impartial credibility, males would be banned to star in condom ads. Instead, chimpanzees can be used for this purpose because they share 90 per cent human DNA and organs.”

Maulana Sheerani labeled mainstream media as “misogynistic” for purposely ignoring abovementioned points. He also certified Khabaristan Times a “Halal Media” for maintaining the spirit of true journalism.


Wife can ‘lightly kick’ husband’s b*lls in self-defense, i
This person qualifies for admission in mental hospital along with full of his team. Husband lightly maray ya na maray ab hamaray tu bila waja sojhnay walay hien...better to have batsman's gaurd.
order it today...iss se pehlay k dair ho jaye
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Great escaaaaaaaaaaape.......:D

Thai man recovering after toilet encounter with *****-biting python

ByAFP

Published:28th May 2016 11:06 AM

Last Updated:28th May 2016 11:07 AM

Email3 (aaaaaaaaaah that feeling of narrow escape ? :sarcastic:
  • Thailand%20Toilet%20Ordea_R.jpg

    In this image made from video, Attaporn Boonmakchuay gestures while talking to reporters, while lying in a hospital bed | AP
BANGKOK: A Thai man who fought off a three-metre (10-foot) python that bit his penis while he was squatting on the toilet is recovering, hospital staff said Saturday.

Atthaporn Boonmakchuay was admitted after surviving the nightmare encounter with a snake hiding in the toilet plumbing at his home in Chachoengsao province east of Bangkok.

"He can urinate as normal and his pain from the wound has reduced," Rungnapa Sehawong, a supervisor at the local Chularat 11 hospital, told AFP.

The 38-year-old was being treated with antibiotics and would likely be released in a few days, she added.

In an interview from his hospital bedside after the incident Wednesday, a smiling Atthaporn told local TV channels the toilet appeared empty when he peaked in before taking a squat.

"But after a while (the snake) rose from the toilet bowl and bit me," he said, explaining how he grabbed the serpent's neck to prevent it from taking him down.

"At first I thought my penis was gone and already torn apart, because it was really very strong," he added.

But he managed to pry open the python's jaws, after which his wife and neighbour rushed to the blood-splattered scene to cover the snake's head with a plastic bag.

A rescue team later took a hammer to the toilet to free the serpent and release it into the wild, local media reported.

While the toilet was damaged in the process, it gave Atthaporn's wife reason to make a new purchase: a shiny modern flush toilet.:lol:

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A girl at bustop spotted a handsome man and without hesitation she told " i love u" Man placed his hand on her head: " this love and infatuation all are nothing, Go back to ur home and study hard so that u can lead a successful life" Man then placed a piece of paper in her hand:" i have written some wisdom for you.read before u sleep" and went away.. Girl went back to hostel with tears and before sleep she opens the paper. "Are you blind?my wife was standing behind me..anyways this is my number call me anytime..by the way.. i love u too!" MEN WILL BE MEN..

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