Stupid and funny from all over the world - II

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Iranian Superman

Passenger: Hi!
Superman: Which way leads me to Shahr-e-Kurd?
Passenger pointing forward

the back view mirror showed the super preferred to sit in the car then flying to reach it

 

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https://www.facebook.com/video.php?v=630038050340027

 

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[NP-complete]

Borat's Kazakhstan National Anthem, lets dedicate it to indian and pakistani internet warriors.

Kazakhstan greatest country in the world all other countrys are run by little girls.
Kazakhstan number one exporter of potassium!
Other countries have inferior potassium.
Kazakhstan home of the tinshein swimming pool it's length thirty metre and width six metre.
Filtration system a marvel to behold it removes 80 percent of human solid waste.
Kazakhstan,Kazakhstan, you very nice place, from plains of tarashenk to northern fence of jewtown.
Kazakhstan, friend of all except Uzbekistan, they very nosey people withe bone in their brain.
Kazakhstan, industry best in the world, we invented toffee and the trouser belt.
Kazakhstan, prostitutes cleanest in the region, except of course for Turkmenistan's.
Kazakhstan,Kazakhstan, you very nice place, from plains of tarashenk to northern fence of jewtown.
Come grasp the mighty phenis of our leader, from junction with testes to tip of its face.

 

[NP-complete]

A man meets a friend whom he hasn’t seen in 20 years. “You look fantastic!” he says. “How do you stay so fit?”

The friend says, “I have one rule. I don’t argue with people.”

The man says, “Come on! How could that account for it?”

The friend says, “You’re right, that couldn’t possibly account for it.”

 

[NP-complete]

Paul Erdös claimed to be two and a half billion years old.

“When I was a child, the Earth was said to be two billion years old,” he said. “Now scientists say it’s four and a half billion. So that makes me two and a half billion.”

 

[NP-complete]

What Robert Benchley learned in his first year at Harvard:

1. Charlemagne either died or was born or did something with the Holy Roman Empire in 800.
2. By placing one paper bag inside another paper bag you can carry home a milk shake in it.
3. There is a double l in the middle of parallel.
4. Powder rubbed on the chin will take the place of a shave if the room isn’t very light.
5. French nouns ending in “aison” are feminine.
6. Almost everything you need to know about a subject is in the encyclopedia.
7. A tasty sandwich can be made by spreading peanut butter on raisin bread.
8. A floating body displaces its own weight in the liquid in which it floats.
9. A sock with a hole in the toe can be worn inside out with comparative comfort.
10. The chances are against filling an inside straight.
11. There is a law in economics called The Law of Diminishing Returns, which means that after a certain margin is reached returns begin to diminish. This may not be correctly stated, but there is a law by that name.
12. You begin tuning a mandolin with A and tune the other strings from that.

“My courses were all selected with a very definite aim in view, with a serious purpose in mind,” he wrote. “No classes before eleven in the morning or after two-thirty in the afternoon, and nothing on Saturday at all. On that rock was my education built.”

 

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https://fbcdn-sphotos-a-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-ash4/407857_10150660999115070_368963593_n.jpg