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My personal rant

World is a beautiful place. People are wonderful. There are very few countries that are as fair pleasant and just as the USA is.

Ofcourse there are problems and degrees of good and bad.

Any country you go to you are going to find certain things to be unhappy about and many things to be happy about.

It is 100% internal within you. Are you ready to admit to yourself your errors and areas of improvement . For example I will point to two things from your post . I am sure you may have mitigating reasons but still worth a think :

1) you use allah and f words in the same sentence. Besides being disrespectful , is it not indication that you do not exercise control on your own senses and behaviour ? Will that magically change in some other country ?

2) you mention a son but don’t think you’ve said anything about your wife . Wouldn’t she be your best friend, have you confided in her ?
 
I wake up every morning betting with Allah swt that society can not be more fukt up as it is. In the face of Allah swt, I always lose.

I go on YouTube and see endless videos of random children talking about blue pill and red pill. Some of them being faggots, while others insulting women.

As an ethnic Punjabi, when I listen to these white faggots insult women my blood boils. My father told me that in our society, the women would build the house using mud clay. My grandmother built our house with her own hands in our village. We live in that house to this day.

This is the society I am living in. The US as a country may be powerful, but it’s a country that is powerless. The new generation is disgusting not only because of their opinions but because of their behavior.

Family values, religion, and the lack of searching for a purpose makes me vomit. I was born in 1990 and the world was becoming such a wonderful place. I was excited.

Today I am absolutely disgusted. I feel like I don’t belong here. I go to work and feel so dissociated with the people I speak with.

People that I speak with seem like the spawn of the devil.

I have gotten married in 2019 and have a child. He seems so happy in Pakistan, I feel like bringing him to the US will **** his mind. In the same token I feel like him living in Pakistan will be no different as the military elite in our country are also faggots and on the payroll of foreign faggots.

Human beings are so fucked in the head they praise AI projects that will replace their own jobs. I can’t even talk to stupid **** people like this.

I don’t know wtf I am doing here on this earth anymore. News songs or movies bring me no joy. American and or western society is no longer exciting because they are on a downward spiral.

I don’t understand wtf I am living life for anymore except that I am a Muslim and suicide is no option. Do I feel suicidal? All the fucking time. Everything disgusts me. When I wake up I feel disgusted. I don’t understand what has happened to me. Is it age or depression or what?

I don’t know wtf is going on. The world has gone crazy but maybe it’s not the world, but just me.

I’m in a very weird place right now. If any of you can relate with me, please show me a way out. I just don’t understand.

Where exactly are you in the US roughly?

Its an immense country, so there is likely a better (or at least more tolerable) spot for you where you wont be bombarded by the upsetting crap.

It is worth cultivating stoicism and virtue in these times.

Ungratefulness and narcissism and the atomized extreme individualism that grows it comes from an extreme epicurean complex in the end. Then it trumpets itself for sake of trumpeting, because these kind of people seek to dominate what is outside them rather than conquer what is within them.

You have family/dependents (the needs of which obviously concern and worry you) so you have unlocked a large part of it already and are on the right path if you stay the course as reasonably as you can. i.e a greater purpose in life you know deep down.

Putting others ahead of you is a big part of realised stoicism in the end....you will never be part of what is upsetting to you around you....as much as it might affect you as you are, like all of us, a perceptible emotional being in the end.

You see it is only those with no true purpose and path of virtue.... that become pawns and lemmings of evil designs.

You are not that person as you have grown something already to work on and you deep down know the fruit of that hard labour will arrive much later.

That is the realisation the epicurean hedonist does not have....he always wants the immediate selfish need at any cost....and loses all sense of greater purpose and being in that pursuit only. The current iteration are the ones that do not strive to even start a family...and those willing to be coerced by this complex. The western world has afforded this dystopia to develop.

i.e It is non-family oriented, isolated types that are driving the mentality you see in the West that you abhor. The family unit has been broken down by big powerful govt + media + corporate to take advantage of the void it leaves (in their selfish pursuit and hubris).

You know this all to be true and you have created life with another, it is something you chose to do (unlike others).... you have taken on the responsibility and deep purpose of this. So you will find answers to get past these troubles, dont worry. I've seen it with many others in similar situation.

Any darkness will inevitably come but ultimately pass like clouds in the sky from this rooted purpose.
 
It is 100% internal within you. Are you ready to admit to yourself your errors and areas of improvement . For example I will point to two things from your post . I am sure you may have mitigating reasons but still worth a think :

1) you use allah and f words in the same sentence. Besides being disrespectful , is it not indication that you do not exercise control on your own senses and behaviour ? Will that magically change in some other country ?

2) you mention a son but don’t think you’ve said anything about your wife . Wouldn’t she be your best friend, have you confided in her ?

Correct, the parameter to see our good and bad is our feeling. From there we can make some sort of self introspection on what Allah doesnt want us to do. When Allah is close and Ridho on us, it will be reflected on our own feeling, as well as when Allah is mad on us and make a distance with our soul.
 
I wake up every morning betting with Allah swt that society can not be more fukt up as it is. In the face of Allah swt, I always lose.

I go on YouTube and see endless videos of random children talking about blue pill and red pill. Some of them being faggots, while others insulting women.

As an ethnic Punjabi, when I listen to these white faggots insult women my blood boils. My father told me that in our society, the women would build the house using mud clay. My grandmother built our house with her own hands in our village. We live in that house to this day.

This is the society I am living in. The US as a country may be powerful, but it’s a country that is powerless. The new generation is disgusting not only because of their opinions but because of their behavior.

Family values, religion, and the lack of searching for a purpose makes me vomit. I was born in 1990 and the world was becoming such a wonderful place. I was excited.

Today I am absolutely disgusted. I feel like I don’t belong here. I go to work and feel so dissociated with the people I speak with.

People that I speak with seem like the spawn of the devil.

I have gotten married in 2019 and have a child. He seems so happy in Pakistan, I feel like bringing him to the US will **** his mind. In the same token I feel like him living in Pakistan will be no different as the military elite in our country are also faggots and on the payroll of foreign faggots.

Human beings are so fucked in the head they praise AI projects that will replace their own jobs. I can’t even talk to stupid **** people like this.

I don’t know wtf I am doing here on this earth anymore. News songs or movies bring me no joy. American and or western society is no longer exciting because they are on a downward spiral.

I don’t understand wtf I am living life for anymore except that I am a Muslim and suicide is no option. Do I feel suicidal? All the fucking time. Everything disgusts me. When I wake up I feel disgusted. I don’t understand what has happened to me. Is it age or depression or what?

I don’t know wtf is going on. The world has gone crazy but maybe it’s not the world, but just me.

I’m in a very weird place right now. If any of you can relate with me, please show me a way out. I just don’t understand.
Oh I can relate
cause it's Literally me, I felt and to some extent I am feeling the same things that you're feeling

One major factor for me was experiencing culture shock. I just didn't feel like I belonged in this society.

I remember my friends casually talking about women using terms like "body count" or referring to them as "bitches." The first time I heard that, I was genuinely shocked.

That kind of language wasn't a part of my upbringing. I grew up with sisters, and my dad never even raised his voice in their presence, let alone use disrespectful terms. He always taught me to respect and protect women.

It's breaks my heart to see how the government almost encourages divorce, which ends up destroying the whole family structure

I am pro lgb as in do whatever the hell you want in your personal space but rn it's going above & beyond in sheer retardness

in Pakistan they're degenerates too in their own way

nowadays I stopped giving a f about"society" and just focus on my family, maybe you need to do the same too
bring over your wife & kid, there's no life without family
 
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please show me a way out. I just don’t understand.
There is no way out, you swallowed the blackpill and saw reality for what it truly is. This society is a rotten mess and once you see it for what it is, you can't unsee it no matter how hard you try. Start meditating, you will be in a state where you are truly in peace with yourself and the external world, your depression and negative feelings will wane away and your perspective will drastically shift for the better. Ignore the "advice" from members to read the Quran like a mindless zombie, that will just further sink you in a deeper rut and black hole.
 
I have lived in the US almost all my life and I simply do not see what you see. You are missing the wood for the trees.

Yes, there are kids who take red pill and blue pill.. But I am pretty sure that Pakistan and Afghanistan have at least as high, if not higher, percentage of kids on drugs and stimulants as does the US.

As for " faggots"...have you heard of Bacha bazi? and in any case, why should it bother you? You don't have to agree with their life choices..just leave them alone and they leave you alone.

America affords us opportunities that the rest of the world cannot even dream about ..that is beyond their imagination and you want to give it up because some people are woke? If it wasn't for liberalism in the US , you and I wouldn't have been allowed to live here in the first place. They opened up immigration to non whites sometime in the 50s or 60ies.

I hope you have a few kind and fun friends. They may not share all your values but that is the beauty of America, you can be friends with someone who does not necessarily see things exactly your way.

Go on vacations, see the world. Spend your money on yourself and your wife and kid.

Anyway, I am sending best wishes and good energy your way...hope you start feeling better soon. Whatever goes down eventually has to come back up again.
 
I feel like at this point of my life, I am not close to my deen. I do the necessary things, but I don’t feel involved personally. Does that make sense?
If conditions were different, if we did not live in mutually hostile nations, I know what I would suggest to you.
 
Depression is a combination of physical and spiritual imbalance.

In the physical side you need to take food supplements, like a daily multivitamin or at least vitamin D3. Definitely take Omega 3. Eat a healthy diet, including fruits and veggies. Exercise.

On the spiritual side, follow the advice others have given about praying and reading the Quran. I would add, depression is worsened by satanic attacks. Read surahs Ikhlas (112), Falak (113) and Nas (114) + Ayat ul Kursi every night before going to bed and any other time you feel down.

Stop listening to news. Spend time with family and friends.
 
I’m in a very weird place right now. If any of you can relate with me, please show me a way out. I just don’t understand.

I have experienced all these feelings at different points in my life.

What works for me is the belief that life has no purpose, no meaning, except what you make out of it. It is a blank canvas that you have to fill in your own way. It is tempting to look up to super achievers, philosophers, chronic multi-taskers, religious leaders and believe that they have it all sorted when we are all confused. This makes you want to follow their template. But I don't want to imply that trying to follow others is the root cause of disenchantment. It is only partly the problem.

I generally avoid writing bullet points as it sounds like a guide, but here I will make an exception:

  1. Always be curious about how things work, why the world is the way it is. By this I don't mean why people are the way they are. That gets tiring. Think of natural phenomenon, or machines. Anything. Read about them. If reading is not easy, learn them by way of some course. Curiosity keeps the child in you alive. When you are curious, you look forward to discovering something, which brings me to the next point.
  2. Always have something to look forward to. That very 'something' moves the wheel of life forward. When you accept that the wheel of life will inevitably move forward, and stop at some point in time, then you will want to fill it with things to do. Again, I don't want to be misunderstood. I am not implying that you cram your life or day or week with things to do. No. Even not doing anything is an action, a decision.
  3. Re-evaluate what line of work really interests you. You are in your 30s I believe. I junked everything in my 40s and decided to experiment with a series of things, and I wish I had done it earlier. I know everyone may not be able to do that. But the correct time to do it is Yesterday. If you do not want to change your line of work, that is also ok, but make peace with it. A lot of us are conditioned into believing that work is what defines us and our life should revolve around it. If you go back into history, you will find that employment is a very recent phenomenon. Earlier people used to do markedly different things to earn their bread, and may not even be employed full time. What matters is financial security that ensures a dignified existence, and it does not have to come from a traditional line of work that keeps you 'employed' all day.
  4. A decade ago I would have advised you to go out and meet more people. That doesn't work for me. All the opinions gleaned from the incessant flood of content from social media has made me judgemental and critical of people. I see a stereotype in every person I meet and I am unable to appreciate them, unless they are like me.
  5. A friend of mine once said "Past is a place of reference, not a place of residence". Do not let nostalgia of the old world make you bitter about the current times. The good times in nostalgia weren't a result of deliberate design. They just were. You can make your own nostalgia in the present.
  6. Limit the flow of opinions in your life. The most useless thing in life is an opinion. Stop giving people more importance than they deserve. In the grand scheme of things, everyone is 99.99% like you. Mortal and unwise about why they are here.
  7. Be grateful for your privilege. For your health, for your good eyesight, for limbs that work and a brain that is perceptive.
  8. Taking a vacation won't help. Unless you get to the root of the problem, when you come back after your vacation, all your problems will still be at your doorstep. Vacation is important, but don't treat it as therapy for these kind of problems.
  9. Don't shy away from seeking professional help. There is no harm in learning from people who know more about the subject than you. We learn math from a good teacher, not from a toddler. Same applies to other things in life
  10. Stay fit, stay energetic.
 
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I wake up every morning betting with Allah swt that society can not be more fukt up as it is. In the face of Allah swt, I always lose.

I go on YouTube and see endless videos of random children talking about blue pill and red pill. Some of them being faggots, while others insulting women.

As an ethnic Punjabi, when I listen to these white faggots insult women my blood boils. My father told me that in our society, the women would build the house using mud clay. My grandmother built our house with her own hands in our village. We live in that house to this day.

This is the society I am living in. The US as a country may be powerful, but it’s a country that is powerless. The new generation is disgusting not only because of their opinions but because of their behavior.

Family values, religion, and the lack of searching for a purpose makes me vomit. I was born in 1990 and the world was becoming such a wonderful place. I was excited.

Today I am absolutely disgusted. I feel like I don’t belong here. I go to work and feel so dissociated with the people I speak with.

People that I speak with seem like the spawn of the devil.

I have gotten married in 2019 and have a child. He seems so happy in Pakistan, I feel like bringing him to the US will **** his mind. In the same token I feel like him living in Pakistan will be no different as the military elite in our country are also faggots and on the payroll of foreign faggots.

Human beings are so fucked in the head they praise AI projects that will replace their own jobs. I can’t even talk to stupid **** people like this.

I don’t know wtf I am doing here on this earth anymore. News songs or movies bring me no joy. American and or western society is no longer exciting because they are on a downward spiral.

I don’t understand wtf I am living life for anymore except that I am a Muslim and suicide is no option. Do I feel suicidal? All the fucking time. Everything disgusts me. When I wake up I feel disgusted. I don’t understand what has happened to me. Is it age or depression or what?

I don’t know wtf is going on. The world has gone crazy but maybe it’s not the world, but just me.

I’m in a very weird place right now. If any of you can relate with me, please show me a way out. I just don’t understand.


Don't give yourself a hard time, The worse problems, of which you speak, you might take in your stride. You are right; take control of what you can but try to find some support. Sometimes, a fresh perspective can help you to see what's staring you in the face. Salah and Quran is a great source of help in this crazy planet Good luck bhai !
 
Chasing the first high!

Just like drugs we in the information age are after that CURIOSITY!
adsense further exasperates it...
The senses never settle...
You keep seeking, reading or more precisely viewing!
With attention spans further shortened and those on the other end getting rewarded for making such content ... one for the eyeballs. $$$ keep filling their minds and mouths...
generating further degeneration!
of course you will see and hear the absurd!

The answer, slowdown!
Very anticlimactic... succinct and precise.
Unplug, withdraw, drain out!
Once done ot wouldn't be the same. It wouldn't give the high however allow for a more clearer understanding... one more grounded perhaps even mundane.
Stop chasing the mirage or battling demons. Go home, grow old.

Let things settle down. Grow with your kid, start anew... make the new world. A more settled, grounded perhaps even mundane!

Good luck on your journey...
 
Taking a vacation won't help. Unless you get to the root of the problem, when you come back after your vacation, all your problems will still be at your doorstep. Vacation is important, but don't treat it as therapy for these kind of problems.
Agree, but also take exception to this point.

Head in the sand and temp relief waali baat nahi hai, hows about looking at it like resurfacing for air, like a whale, or a diesel electric submarine that needs to.

The US navy does these "steel beach" things even though their nuke subs have no need to, just so the crew can have a bit of fun in between their very serious mission of nuclear retaliatory (or first) strike, deterrence, essentially.

A bit of a break might not cure whatever might be ailing him, but it will provide some much needed relief.
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As an ethnic Punjabi, when I listen to these white faggots insult women my blood boils.

Actually, the word you're looking for is "incel."

Just sayin'!

I was born in 1990

Join the club, bubba.

September 1990 here!

AI projects that will replace their own jobs. I can’t even talk to stupid **** people like this.

That's what my boss is saying, actually, even though I'm convinced that A.I is going to take away my job in less than 2 years.

I guess I can do manual labor, if push comes to shove. After all, I was a lowly salesman working 86 hours a week back in my early 20s.

6 days x 13 hours + 8 hours on Sunday + 1 "Holiday" per month, and I was supposed to inform my boss about the "holiday" at least 3 days in advance.

Sometimes, I wonder why I didn't go postal? You know, killed the boss, and then turned the gun on myself, heh! Probably because of Islam's strict stance on suicide and homicide + I couldn't even afford a gun back then!

Anyhow, if 86 hours don't sound like much to you, I was also supposed to stand at my job all the time. My boss would start giving me the dirty looks if I even try to put my back against the wall, to ease some pressure off of my swelling feet.

And each day, all we had was a quick 15 minute potty + food break, and that was that.

Do I feel suicidal?

Just unaddressed stress and anxiety.

If any of you can relate with me, please show me a way out. I just don’t understand.

Whenever I feel anxious, I visit the mall where I used to work as a salesman. It helps clear my head and puts things into perspective. It was a literal nightmare, and I am grateful that I no longer have to endure such tough hours.

So, when you feel like you have to climb a tall hill to progress in life, just look back. More often than not, you will see an even bigger hill that you have climbed in the past but have forgotten since.
 
There is no way out, you swallowed the blackpill and saw reality for what it truly is. This society is a rotten mess and once you see it for what it is, you can't unsee it no matter how hard you try. Start meditating, you will be in a state where you are truly in peace with yourself and the external world, your depression and negative feelings will wane away and your perspective will drastically shift for the better. Ignore the "advice" from members to read the Quran like a mindless zombie, that will just further sink you in a deeper rut and black hole.

None said to read Quran like a mindless zombie.

I myself tried the template of objective setting and goal achievement of all things material, such as career, fitness, assets, get settled down, being responsible, all good things meant for this worldly life.

It works but that's not enough. It would also eventually lead to hollowness. Or at least one would definitely wonder while on their death bed, if they did justice with their life ...

This life is given as a gift with a defined timeline. Whatever is meant for us in this world will come to us, or we would find ourselves drifting towards it. Whatever is not meant for us, it would never come to us. Whatever is meant to leave, it would leave, no matter what.

When we read recite Quran and try to ponder on the meanings of verses, the purpose of life becomes very clear. That to me is the only solution to make do with this life, especially when one is blessed with the real understanding of what this world is.

For those among us who live in Western world, are already have enough exposure of this world. Hence, we are at a better position to steer our life towards the right cause.
 
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