Military humour..:)

[Aarush]

Wit and wisdom from military manuals

"A slipping gear could let your M203 grenade launcher fire when you
least expect it. That would make you quite unpopular in what's left of
your unit." - Army's magazine of preventive maintenance

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"Aim towards the Enemy." - Instruction printed on U.S. Rocket Launcher

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Teamwork is essential. It gives them more targets to shoot at.

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Remember: your aircraft was made by the lowest bidder.
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You are not Tom Cruise.

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If you aren't sure, the SAMs are pointed at you.

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If you are shot on everything but enemy, you are in combat.

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Have a back-up plan, because the first one probably won't work.

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"When the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade is not our friend." - U.S. Marine Corps

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"Cluster bombing from B-52s is very, very accurate. The bombs are
guaranteed always to hit the ground." - USAF Ammo Troop

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"If the enemy is in range, so are you." - Infantry Journal

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"It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just
bombed." - U.S. Air Force Manual

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"Whoever said the pen is mightier than the sword obviously never
encountered automatic weapons." - General MacArthur

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"Try to look unimportant; they may be low on ammo." - Infantry Journal

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"You, you, and you. Panic. The rest of you, come with me." - U.S.
Marine Corps Gunnery Sgt.

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"Don't ever be the first, don't ever be the last, and don't ever
volunteer to do anything." - U.S. Navy Swabbie

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"Bravery is being the only one who knows you're afraid." - David Hackworth

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"If your attack is going too well, you're walking into an ambush." -
Infantry Journal

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"No combat-ready unit has ever passed inspection." - Joe Gay

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"Never tell the Platoon Sergeant you have nothing to do." - Unknown
Marine Recruit


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"If you see a bomb technician running, follow him." - USAF Ammo Troop

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"You've never been lost until you've been lost at Mach 3." - Paul F.
Crickmore (test pilot)

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"The only time you have too much fuel is when you're on fire."

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"If the wings are traveling faster than the fuselage, it's probably a
helicopter -- and therefore, unsafe."

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"When one engine fails on a twin-engine airplane, you always have
enough power left to get you to the scene of the crash."

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"Without ammunition, the USAF would be just another expensive flying club."

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"What is the similarity between air traffic controllers and pilots? If
a pilot screws up, the pilot dies; If ATC screws up, .... the pilot
dies."

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The three most common expressions (or famous last words) in aviation
are: "Why is it doing that?", "Where are we?" And "Oh S...!"

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"Airspeed, altitude and brains. Two are always needed to complete the
flight successfully."

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"Flying the airplane is more important than radioing your plight to a
person on the ground who is incapable of understanding or doing
anything about it."


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"A pilot who doesn't have any fear probably isn't flying his plane to
its maximum." - Jon McBride, astronaut

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"If you're faced with a forced landing, fly the thing as far into the
crash as possible." - Bob Hoover (renowned aerobatic and test pilot )

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"Never fly in the same cockpit with someone braver than you."