war&peace
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7 Answers
Deya Roy, Defense enthusiast, family & friends in Forces & Services (DRDO, INMAS, Para)
Updated Oct 31 2016 · Author has 288 answers and 1.1m answer views
Unfortunately, you will not like my answer. I don’t know about around the world, however, I can tell you about India.
As Narendara Kumar puts it so well, “Not willing to hurt anyone's feelings... if the question is here, the answer should not be a lie.”
I am not making any claims, but just stating what I have heard from friends in the Armed Forces...
Let me start by saying I am PROUD to be an INDIAN, and I am also a staunch supporter of the Armed Forces, always wanted to join, but could not due to health issues…
INCIDENTS OF WIFE SWAPPING
Yes, I have heard Wife-swapping is quite common, especially in the Indian Navy, it definitely happens in the Army and sometimes in the Air Force, though from what I have heard IAF cases are very few and far-between.
However, like a fellow Quoranian Harmeet says, “all five fingers are not same, there may be some black sheep in our defense forces.”
The Indian Navy has been known to treat women very badly, even their female officers, it has been in the news for actually harnessing them during ongoing Supreme Court cases, so this treatment does not really surprise me!
Ghosts of a 2013 Indian Navy "wife-swapping" allegation returned to haunt the nation… as the divorced wife of a lieutenant in Indian navy, recently revealed that not only is wife swapping a norm in the Indian navy but it is fast becoming a necessity as only those Indian naval officers “liberal” enough to share their wives’ get far in their careers…
According to sources, when the IIT-Bombay graduate witnessed her Navy officer husband in a compromising position with a senior officer’s wife was informed that she too would have to be part of the “wife-swapping evenings” if she wanted her husband to keep his job.
“There are parties everyday and the women wear very revealing clothes. Wife-swapping is common here,” she said. “I was made to bend down and molested, by three of my husband’s colleagues…Officers and sailors, were all afraid to come to my rescue because they feared being thrown out of the Navy,” she further stated.
According to Anonymous, “let me assure you that not the whole of the Defense Forces can be accused of such degraded morals… I have seen proofs of what happened, whether anyone believes or not and I have been threatened to not support her, or either she or her husband would be killed...”
Edited (26.10.2016)
Wife-swapping and sexual discrimination of women officers are quite common in the army as well, especially for promotions.
As per my friends in the army, Forces are very hierarchical and your senior is like the King, if not god. There have been many incidents where seniors have offered junior officers quick promotions in Army parties in exchange for nights with their wives.
Wives complain, sometimes, so we hear about it, whereas female officers hardly ever do! They just get angry with their seniors and take it out on male soldiers.
Some wives have been known to commit suicide, a handful state reason and name culprits in their suicide note. Those have been known to receive punishment and sometimes have been dismissed without benefits.
Read More: Navy wife swapping scandal: SC wants special team to probe case
REASONS FOR SUCH DISGUSTING BEHAVIOR
As Rajiv also rightly points out, It is the fault of the INDIAN SOCIETY as a whole, not just the Armed Forces.
We need to change the way Society deals with Women, who are constantly told men will be men, deal with it. He is you Husband/father / brother don’t you love him? Or men will look, they are more horny and all that rot!
HOW INDIAN FORCES THINK ABOUT FEMALE COLLEAGUES?
I know the question is about wife-swapping, but I am going to deviate a bit from it and take it to women officers… You will see why… how people treat their wives depends on how people look at women in general…
REAL LIFE EXPERIENCES
@padamchen
Deya Roy, Defense enthusiast, family & friends in Forces & Services (DRDO, INMAS, Para)
Updated Oct 31 2016 · Author has 288 answers and 1.1m answer views
Unfortunately, you will not like my answer. I don’t know about around the world, however, I can tell you about India.
As Narendara Kumar puts it so well, “Not willing to hurt anyone's feelings... if the question is here, the answer should not be a lie.”
I am not making any claims, but just stating what I have heard from friends in the Armed Forces...
Let me start by saying I am PROUD to be an INDIAN, and I am also a staunch supporter of the Armed Forces, always wanted to join, but could not due to health issues…
INCIDENTS OF WIFE SWAPPING
Yes, I have heard Wife-swapping is quite common, especially in the Indian Navy, it definitely happens in the Army and sometimes in the Air Force, though from what I have heard IAF cases are very few and far-between.
However, like a fellow Quoranian Harmeet says, “all five fingers are not same, there may be some black sheep in our defense forces.”
The Indian Navy has been known to treat women very badly, even their female officers, it has been in the news for actually harnessing them during ongoing Supreme Court cases, so this treatment does not really surprise me!
Ghosts of a 2013 Indian Navy "wife-swapping" allegation returned to haunt the nation… as the divorced wife of a lieutenant in Indian navy, recently revealed that not only is wife swapping a norm in the Indian navy but it is fast becoming a necessity as only those Indian naval officers “liberal” enough to share their wives’ get far in their careers…
According to sources, when the IIT-Bombay graduate witnessed her Navy officer husband in a compromising position with a senior officer’s wife was informed that she too would have to be part of the “wife-swapping evenings” if she wanted her husband to keep his job.
“There are parties everyday and the women wear very revealing clothes. Wife-swapping is common here,” she said. “I was made to bend down and molested, by three of my husband’s colleagues…Officers and sailors, were all afraid to come to my rescue because they feared being thrown out of the Navy,” she further stated.
According to Anonymous, “let me assure you that not the whole of the Defense Forces can be accused of such degraded morals… I have seen proofs of what happened, whether anyone believes or not and I have been threatened to not support her, or either she or her husband would be killed...”
Edited (26.10.2016)
Wife-swapping and sexual discrimination of women officers are quite common in the army as well, especially for promotions.
As per my friends in the army, Forces are very hierarchical and your senior is like the King, if not god. There have been many incidents where seniors have offered junior officers quick promotions in Army parties in exchange for nights with their wives.
Wives complain, sometimes, so we hear about it, whereas female officers hardly ever do! They just get angry with their seniors and take it out on male soldiers.
Some wives have been known to commit suicide, a handful state reason and name culprits in their suicide note. Those have been known to receive punishment and sometimes have been dismissed without benefits.
Read More: Navy wife swapping scandal: SC wants special team to probe case
REASONS FOR SUCH DISGUSTING BEHAVIOR
As Rajiv also rightly points out, It is the fault of the INDIAN SOCIETY as a whole, not just the Armed Forces.
We need to change the way Society deals with Women, who are constantly told men will be men, deal with it. He is you Husband/father / brother don’t you love him? Or men will look, they are more horny and all that rot!
HOW INDIAN FORCES THINK ABOUT FEMALE COLLEAGUES?
I know the question is about wife-swapping, but I am going to deviate a bit from it and take it to women officers… You will see why… how people treat their wives depends on how people look at women in general…
- There aren't many women officers in the Defense services. The army has just 3 per cent women, the Navy 2.8 per cent and the Air Force performs best with 8.5 per cent.
- In India, women are prohibited from combat service. The reason put forth by the service chiefs before the Parliamentary Committee on Women's Empowerment was that in the case of women being captured by the enemy, the troops would be demoralized.
- So it is not women's safety which is the concern here but that male morale would be affected if "their" women were captured.Women as trophies for the enemy or women as symbols of the nation; nothing about the sovereign rights of women themselves.
REAL LIFE EXPERIENCES
- A very close Paramilitary friend of mine once said that he thought the Naxals and even terrorists treated their female commorads better than the Armed Forces treat their women officers.
- He also said, “ seeing what I have seen, if my sister wanted to join the Armed Forces, I would rather hit her and lock her up, than her join the forces. It is a very dark place for women”.
- An Army friend of mine, who hails from an educated, respectable family in Bihar, she was the University Topper, all rounder Principals Trophy winner of Miranda House, got so upset with SSC in the Indian Army, she quit after 10 years, married 2–3 years after she quit and now wants to leave India for good.
- When asked for details, she just refuses to comment except for saying most Army men especially officers are MCPs, she also goes on to say Bollywood is better, at least you can see the predators up front and have free-will to refuse! (an accomplished kathak dancer she tried her hand there as well, so I guess know)
@padamchen
