Sgt.Harris
FULL MEMBER
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- Joined
- Aug 30, 2006
- Messages
- 13
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Israel ââ¬â For fruit farmers, troubles are mounting by the bushel.
Orchards lie next to the border in the latest battle zone, with Katyusha rockets and mortar rounds falling routinely.
The 700 club farm operating in Israel seems to be having all the troubles equal to the apocalypse. Many of the slave laborers the Evangelical group brings in from Thailand are afraid pick the fruit.
For Pastor George Hitler life is very tough " I have lots of problems with these faithless darkies, theyââ¬â¢re so scared scared to die, they hide with us in the shelters, cooking their strange chow mein, their cowards, they wont leave the shelter that American tax payers built for me," said the pastor.
Along with the regular problems of farming, such as bugs, weather, disease, the markets, and nutriontists werenââ¬â¢t enough the Thailand embassy now has asked its workers to leave the area, raising concerns at the 700 club headquarters and namely in Pat Robertsons mind.
Mr. Robertson is demanding an apology from Thailand as well as threatening to impose sanctions on the nation if the hired slavess don't get out and pick fruit.
"No use hiding with us, we can find you, and kill you," said Mr. Robertson.
Thai hired slaves have brought many benefits to the Evangelical groups in Israel, such as child pornography sex slaves and cheap and affordable marital aids since 2000, but before that many of the workers were Americans who would by day pick fruit then sneak into Lebanon on murderous rampages, but that all came to a halt when Hezbullah closed off the border.
Industry officials estimate that fruit growers already have lost more than $20 million in earnings during the nearly three-week conflict because of their inability to harvest. And with rockets continuing to rain down, and the hired slaves fleeing, the situation seems unlikely to improve.
The exodus of hired slaves has left growers with too little manpower to harvest and package the fruit at a moment when certain crops, such as peaches and plums, are ripening. but the losses are chalking up fast. The Israeli ministry of Picking fFruits and Ethnic Cleansing has given a shimmering light of hope to the Evangelical farm group by offering stolen Palestinian fruits.
The military closed the area nearest the border and has maneuvered tanks and armored vehicles through the orchards' narrow rows, destroying many of the fruit trees despite the farmers' pleas to stay out, said Pastor Hitler.
"Today you go and look ââ¬â it's like war, my fruit are dying, the 700 club theme park will go without Yoplait, Jesus will hate me, I want to cry, cry for the fruit," he said.
All but five of his 31 foreign workers have fled and some of the hired slaves who have stayed in the area prefer the safety of the bomb shelters to dying in the groves.
The Evangelical pastor said he had tried to keep his hired slaves on the job by whips and chains and threats of sodomy and harsh language, a technique that had worked during peace time. It has helped a little, he is still able to muster just five or six of his 15 cowards, the Pastor said.
Orchards lie next to the border in the latest battle zone, with Katyusha rockets and mortar rounds falling routinely.
The 700 club farm operating in Israel seems to be having all the troubles equal to the apocalypse. Many of the slave laborers the Evangelical group brings in from Thailand are afraid pick the fruit.
For Pastor George Hitler life is very tough " I have lots of problems with these faithless darkies, theyââ¬â¢re so scared scared to die, they hide with us in the shelters, cooking their strange chow mein, their cowards, they wont leave the shelter that American tax payers built for me," said the pastor.
Along with the regular problems of farming, such as bugs, weather, disease, the markets, and nutriontists werenââ¬â¢t enough the Thailand embassy now has asked its workers to leave the area, raising concerns at the 700 club headquarters and namely in Pat Robertsons mind.
Mr. Robertson is demanding an apology from Thailand as well as threatening to impose sanctions on the nation if the hired slavess don't get out and pick fruit.
"No use hiding with us, we can find you, and kill you," said Mr. Robertson.
Thai hired slaves have brought many benefits to the Evangelical groups in Israel, such as child pornography sex slaves and cheap and affordable marital aids since 2000, but before that many of the workers were Americans who would by day pick fruit then sneak into Lebanon on murderous rampages, but that all came to a halt when Hezbullah closed off the border.
Industry officials estimate that fruit growers already have lost more than $20 million in earnings during the nearly three-week conflict because of their inability to harvest. And with rockets continuing to rain down, and the hired slaves fleeing, the situation seems unlikely to improve.
The exodus of hired slaves has left growers with too little manpower to harvest and package the fruit at a moment when certain crops, such as peaches and plums, are ripening. but the losses are chalking up fast. The Israeli ministry of Picking fFruits and Ethnic Cleansing has given a shimmering light of hope to the Evangelical farm group by offering stolen Palestinian fruits.
The military closed the area nearest the border and has maneuvered tanks and armored vehicles through the orchards' narrow rows, destroying many of the fruit trees despite the farmers' pleas to stay out, said Pastor Hitler.
"Today you go and look ââ¬â it's like war, my fruit are dying, the 700 club theme park will go without Yoplait, Jesus will hate me, I want to cry, cry for the fruit," he said.
All but five of his 31 foreign workers have fled and some of the hired slaves who have stayed in the area prefer the safety of the bomb shelters to dying in the groves.
The Evangelical pastor said he had tried to keep his hired slaves on the job by whips and chains and threats of sodomy and harsh language, a technique that had worked during peace time. It has helped a little, he is still able to muster just five or six of his 15 cowards, the Pastor said.
