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Why men rape, in their own words: sex offenders in India and what makes it such a dangerous place for women
Published: 10:45am, 15 Aug, 2020
A protest in New Delhi following the brutal gang rape and murder of a medical student on a bus, in December 2012. Photo: Getty Images
Why Men Rape: An Indian Undercover Investigation by Tara Kaushal, HarperCollins. 5/5 stars
A study conducted by the Thomson Reuters Foundation in 2018 ranked India as
the world’s most dangerous country for women.
The issues examined included sexual violence and trafficking, gender-based social discrimination, lack of access to and control over contraception and childbirth, health care and maternal mortality rates. Mental and physical abuse, religious and cultural facets such as acid attacks, female infanticide, female genital mutilation, and forced and child marriages were also weighed.
Sexual violence against women is an absolute reality in many cultures around the world. In India, however, it is deeply rooted in patriarchal norms and the belief that men are superior to women and that a man should always be a protector of women.
Rather than being seen as equals or complementary to one another, males and females in India are poles apart in terms of economic, educational and social status and opportunities, and nutrition, health and well-being. This is the reason behind the skewed sex ratio
of – according to government figures – 943 females for every 1,000 males.
The scourge of sexual violence in India came to international attention with high-profile cases such as a 2012 New Delhi gang rape and murder
that occurred on a public bus.
Why Men Rape is the result of an in-depth investigation into the reasons for the ever-increasing number of rapes in India. The narrative unfolds primarily through the voices of nine Indian men who have committed acts of sexual violence and rape.
As a staunch feminist and a childhood rape survivor herself, Tara Kaushal has included men from different social strata, and across class, caste, religion, income and regional divides. She also refers to reports by leading researchers in the field, and interviews with rape survivors and experts.
The book opens with an Arthur Conan Doyle quote: “While the individual man is an insoluble puzzle, in the aggregate he becomes a mathematical certainty.” Before delving into the research methodologies or identifying a solution to the crisis, the author defines rape for the many Indians who aren’t aware of what it actually is.
Kaushal writes: “There are many Indians, living simultaneously in many centuries.” Which is why she has selected subjects who are demographically represented across religions, languages, social classes and rural and urban areas.
Writer Tara Kaushal. Photo: Sahil Mane
During her interviews, Kaushal found that none of her nine subjects understood the meaning or necessity of consent from a female partner in a sexual relationship or respected them as individuals with their own unique identities. One of them, a serial gang rapist, even refused to accept the idea of rape.
Another subject, a doctor, raped a 12-year-old bedridden patient following an operation, in full awareness of the mental trauma he was causing. The attack left the patient crippled and incapable of talking about the assault for decades out of fear and shock.
Instant sexual gratification, power plays, a domineering, superior attitude, revenge and enmity for the victim or her family have all been found to have played a role in rapes around the country.
In India, rape often leads to the victim losing her “honour” and many Indians believe that “good” women do not get raped. While much importance is placed on an Indian woman’s virginity or purity of character, there is no similar expectation of men, although the term “virgin” is a non-gender-specific noun. While popular media does use terms such as “monsters” or “animals” to describe rapists, there is no moral or religious context attached to this.
While introducing Dipu Raja Yadav, an 18-year-old from a northern Indian village accused of gang rape, Kaushal narrates the events that surrounded his birth, as told to her by his mother: “She spoke of her intensifying despair and the desperate fasts she had kept for a son.
“Her husband and in-laws had been incensed at the parade of daughters that had descended from her womb. One of her husband’s brothers had even married a second time after his first wife bore three girls.” And so Dipu’s birth was greeted as a blessing by the entire family.
Kaushal writes that generations of misogyny and a lack of healthy communication about sexuality, in combination with the primary source of sex education having become an excessive consumption of ****, thanks to the mobile phone revolution, have led to the current state of affairs.
Why Men Rape highlights the notion of supremacy and favouritism that is bestowed on male children in many Indian families. Phrases such as raja beta (“king son”), kul deepak (“successor of a family”) or blessings that translate as “may you bear a hundred sons” abound in Indian dialects.
Women travel on a bus in New Delhi, in October, following a municipal government scheme that offers women free bus tickets. Photo: AFP
The author notes that even in the fast evolving, international language of English, there are differences beyond gender in the meanings of the words “bachelor” and “spinster."
While the former evokes ideas of freedom, fun or kingliness, the latter is often indicative of celibacy, loneliness or abstinence. Meanwhile, in modern American English, the word “bachelorette” is sometimes used in place of “spinster”.
Bollywood movies and soaps have also contributed to sexual violence and discrimination against women, while at the same time placing the onus for moral policing largely on women. And a number of Indian politicians have blamed such things as mobile phones, jeans, condom adverts and even the eating of fried noodles or meat for the country’s culture of rape and sexual violence.
Why Men Rape provides valuable insights into the psychology of rape and rapists in India. Most importantly, it answers the question posed by the title.
- Herself a victim of sexual violence, Tara Kaushal interviews nine Indian men who have committed acts of sexual violence and rape
- Their testimonies provide valuable and disturbing insights into the psychology of rape and rapists in the country
Published: 10:45am, 15 Aug, 2020
A protest in New Delhi following the brutal gang rape and murder of a medical student on a bus, in December 2012. Photo: Getty Images
Why Men Rape: An Indian Undercover Investigation by Tara Kaushal, HarperCollins. 5/5 stars
A study conducted by the Thomson Reuters Foundation in 2018 ranked India as
the world’s most dangerous country for women.
The issues examined included sexual violence and trafficking, gender-based social discrimination, lack of access to and control over contraception and childbirth, health care and maternal mortality rates. Mental and physical abuse, religious and cultural facets such as acid attacks, female infanticide, female genital mutilation, and forced and child marriages were also weighed.
Sexual violence against women is an absolute reality in many cultures around the world. In India, however, it is deeply rooted in patriarchal norms and the belief that men are superior to women and that a man should always be a protector of women.
Rather than being seen as equals or complementary to one another, males and females in India are poles apart in terms of economic, educational and social status and opportunities, and nutrition, health and well-being. This is the reason behind the skewed sex ratio
of – according to government figures – 943 females for every 1,000 males.
The scourge of sexual violence in India came to international attention with high-profile cases such as a 2012 New Delhi gang rape and murder
that occurred on a public bus.
Why Men Rape is the result of an in-depth investigation into the reasons for the ever-increasing number of rapes in India. The narrative unfolds primarily through the voices of nine Indian men who have committed acts of sexual violence and rape.
As a staunch feminist and a childhood rape survivor herself, Tara Kaushal has included men from different social strata, and across class, caste, religion, income and regional divides. She also refers to reports by leading researchers in the field, and interviews with rape survivors and experts.
The book opens with an Arthur Conan Doyle quote: “While the individual man is an insoluble puzzle, in the aggregate he becomes a mathematical certainty.” Before delving into the research methodologies or identifying a solution to the crisis, the author defines rape for the many Indians who aren’t aware of what it actually is.
Kaushal writes: “There are many Indians, living simultaneously in many centuries.” Which is why she has selected subjects who are demographically represented across religions, languages, social classes and rural and urban areas.
Writer Tara Kaushal. Photo: Sahil Mane
During her interviews, Kaushal found that none of her nine subjects understood the meaning or necessity of consent from a female partner in a sexual relationship or respected them as individuals with their own unique identities. One of them, a serial gang rapist, even refused to accept the idea of rape.
Another subject, a doctor, raped a 12-year-old bedridden patient following an operation, in full awareness of the mental trauma he was causing. The attack left the patient crippled and incapable of talking about the assault for decades out of fear and shock.
Instant sexual gratification, power plays, a domineering, superior attitude, revenge and enmity for the victim or her family have all been found to have played a role in rapes around the country.
In India, rape often leads to the victim losing her “honour” and many Indians believe that “good” women do not get raped. While much importance is placed on an Indian woman’s virginity or purity of character, there is no similar expectation of men, although the term “virgin” is a non-gender-specific noun. While popular media does use terms such as “monsters” or “animals” to describe rapists, there is no moral or religious context attached to this.
While introducing Dipu Raja Yadav, an 18-year-old from a northern Indian village accused of gang rape, Kaushal narrates the events that surrounded his birth, as told to her by his mother: “She spoke of her intensifying despair and the desperate fasts she had kept for a son.
“Her husband and in-laws had been incensed at the parade of daughters that had descended from her womb. One of her husband’s brothers had even married a second time after his first wife bore three girls.” And so Dipu’s birth was greeted as a blessing by the entire family.
Kaushal writes that generations of misogyny and a lack of healthy communication about sexuality, in combination with the primary source of sex education having become an excessive consumption of ****, thanks to the mobile phone revolution, have led to the current state of affairs.
Why Men Rape highlights the notion of supremacy and favouritism that is bestowed on male children in many Indian families. Phrases such as raja beta (“king son”), kul deepak (“successor of a family”) or blessings that translate as “may you bear a hundred sons” abound in Indian dialects.
Women travel on a bus in New Delhi, in October, following a municipal government scheme that offers women free bus tickets. Photo: AFP
The author notes that even in the fast evolving, international language of English, there are differences beyond gender in the meanings of the words “bachelor” and “spinster."
While the former evokes ideas of freedom, fun or kingliness, the latter is often indicative of celibacy, loneliness or abstinence. Meanwhile, in modern American English, the word “bachelorette” is sometimes used in place of “spinster”.
Bollywood movies and soaps have also contributed to sexual violence and discrimination against women, while at the same time placing the onus for moral policing largely on women. And a number of Indian politicians have blamed such things as mobile phones, jeans, condom adverts and even the eating of fried noodles or meat for the country’s culture of rape and sexual violence.
Why Men Rape provides valuable insights into the psychology of rape and rapists in India. Most importantly, it answers the question posed by the title.
