Think twice before you marry a cousin

[DayDreamerz]

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SIRs G ,,, No JOKe but true ,, their was no co-any thing in AFGHANS ,,co-education co-job kind of system ,,so no chance of any solve marriage ,,,, and arrange were usually among cousins ,,, not first then door karreb kay cause NOT YOU but your ALDERS KNOW THEM ,,,,With ALL your due Respect and Apologize ,,,,,,,,,,,,,

dont agree. bye

Sirs G with All you due respect and apologize ,,, their was no word like co-education or co-anything in PAKISTAN ,,,SO donot even Dare to think of that Please for your own good ,, and please excuse MY poor ENGLISH was and is bad from ever ,,, or typos ,,, I meant to say ,,,, so elders atleast knows both of them habitually and etc etc etc REST ARE YOURs judgment ,,,TAHNX AND APOLOGIZE again ,,,,With ALL YOUR DUE RESPECT ,, ha this English ,,all damage done by SIR SAyEeD AHMAD KHAN ... (sorry even do not know how to spell this Great AFGHANS Name) who invented English ,,, put every thing in it like verbs pro-verb adjectives and tense to make us more tense ,

 

[Salik]

Arranged marriage .................. you will be fckd by a complete stranger and little chance that you will be tortured too with passage of time

Love marriage ..................... you will be fckd by someone you already know and will have to smile while you get tortured from day 1.




Hence your hypothesis is wrong.

Sir @User

I am not talking about 'YOU' but your kids.

So do you have any data to prove my hypothesis wrong.

 

[I.R.A]

Sir @User

I am not talking about 'YOU' but your kids.

So do you have any data to prove my hypothesis wrong.

Sir I think if its the first marriage between the cousins like if the parents of the newly wed are not cousins already, they may have a chance at healthy kids but when it gets too much interlinked then most probably someone would suffer. In our villages most of the weddings happen in family and the chances of us seeing kids born with some sort of syndrome have been thin. ALLAH knows best

But I would still prefer marrying out of family and bradari ................... it helps in building bonds and reducing genetic illnesses and obviously healthy future a stronger Pakistan.


Edit: But still marriage outside the family or biradari can be an arranged one ........... it is not necessary that it has to be love marriage .............. in my case it was all arranged turned to love.

 

[Djinn]

I am not in favor of getting married and having children at all. I hate people Man how I wish for an apocalypse. BTW this 'marrying your cousin' thing seems over blown, rarely have i come across people with disabilities as a consequence of so-called in breeding, the world can use less breeding especially Pakistan, but that's never gonna happen.

 

[Blue Marlin]

nasty, once up on a time when your both 5 years old playing in the park and on the swings,and next thing your know 20 years later you both on top of each other having sex. how do explain that to your kids when they asked how did you meet? listen people of south asia there plenty of fish in the sea dont be lazy!
that includes a certain ttc................. no names mentioned.

 

[Peaceful Civilian]

I hate cousin marriages . Yakh...

 

[Blue Marlin]

Unfortunately, today's concepts are different. During the time of the Sahabah, things had to be proven "haram" rather than the other way around. Today, every other thing is declared haram by the isolationist insecurities of the unqualified clergy.


Used to be, now it is a case of playing it safe and avoiding domestic disputes by keeping the status quo of a relationship.
In other words, no further adjustment needed in the still present joint family system within third world societies.

still a bad justification,just so that your kept in the family. marry someone who likes your family especially your mother oh and you too. traditional love marrages where a bunch of 20 years olds get in love and get married are rare now but do happen in low class families. people tend to have life partners rather than wifes. heck was your marriage arranged or do did you fall in love with with a blonde texan?

 

[Jugger]

Cousin marriages was done to keep the family wealth within it.
Many english princes married their cousins, the results were children with genetic disorders.

 

[pak-marine]

Bismillah ir Rahman ar Raheem

The Yehud used to pester Musa (Peace be upon him) on every little matter - please see the case of the Ba'qara (Cow) in the Quran surah (Ch. 2: Verse 67-71) of the same name.

Thus, they had themselves to blame for a lot of limitations posed upon them, such as having to keep dairy and meat utensils separate, the Sabbath limitations, and not being able to marry anyone related to them within twelve degrees of separation.

Our Nabi (Peace be upon him) told the Sahaba not to ask unnecessary questions like the Yehud so that religion would be made easier onto them, and the Sahaba would wait for some "A'arabi" (Bedouin) new to Islam to come and ask questions (as Allah willed), so that they may learn the answers to many less than essential questions that arose in their minds - please see Bukhari's Jami al Sahih for the hadith.

Now, there are a lot of things in this world that might not be beneficial to a person maybe once in a million cases. There are also things that have small benefits but whose dangers are much more (such as 'khamar', i.e. narcotic-like substances that cloud your mind, usually translated as just 'alcohol'), or even things that have no benefits at all, and these are outright forbidden. The things that are only beneficial to us such as Salah (prayer) and Saum (fasting) are enjoined onto us and obligatory.

Now, the first kind mentioned in the above paragraph, such as mixing dairy and meat, working on the Juma'a (the real & original Sabbath) except at prayer time, and being able to marry your 1st, 2nd, 3rd.. cousin; all these are Mab'ah (allowed) for us.



On the authority of Abu Hurayrah Abdur’Rahman ibn Sakhr (may Allah be pleased with him) who said: “I heard the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) saying”: “What I have forbidden you, stay away from. What I have ordered you to do, do as much of it as you can. Verily, the people before you were destroyed only because of their excessive questioning and their disagreeing with their prophets”. Reported in Bukhari and Muslim

And if among the things that are Mab'ah, anyone should face some confusion (or even if you are inclined towards one option over another) :

According to Bukhari, Volume 2, Book 21, Number 263:
Narrated Jabir bin 'Abdullah :The Prophet (Sallal Laho Alaihi Wasallam) used to teach us the way of doing Istikhara, in all matters as he taught us the Suras of the Quran. He said, "If anyone of you thinks of doing any job he should offer a two Rakat prayer other than the compulsory ones and say (after the prayer):

TRANSLATION: "O Allah! I seek goodness from Your Knowledge and with Your Power (and Might) I seek strength, and I ask from You Your Great Blessings, because You have the Power and I do not have the power. You Know everything and I do not know, and You have knowledge of the unseen. Oh Allah! If in Your Knowledge this action ------------------------------------------------ (name the action or think of it here) is better for my religion and faith, for my life and end [death], for here [in this world] and the hereafter then make it destined for me and make it easy for me and then add blessings [baraka'] in it, for me. O Allah! In Your Knowledge if this action is bad for me, bad for my religion and faith, for my life and end [death], for here [in this world] and the hereafter then turn it away from me and turn me away from it and whatever is better for me, ordain [destine] that for me and then make me satisfied with it."
Note: Related in Sahih Ahadith with slightly different phrasing as well.

So, please enjoy all the benefits and freedoms Allah has bestowed upon our Shariah (including marrying your cousins); just make sure to say Bismillah first and make Istikhara whenever you are able to.

Any mistakes herein are from me and my shaitan. Wallah o A'alan o bis Sawab (only Allah knows best).

Hifz u kum Allah

Too long bro since you wrote cant u summarize this for us in a sentence

 

[SQ8]

still a bad justification,just so that your kept in the family. marry someone who likes your family especially your mother oh and you too. traditional love marrages where a bunch of 20 years olds get in love and get married are rare now but do happen in low class families. people tend to have life partners rather than wifes. heck was your marriage arranged or do did you fall in love with with a blonde texan?

Im not married, and generally not interested in the concept

 

[Blue Marlin]

Im not married, and generally not interested in the concept

ok great not the main point im after that was more of a finisher but ok. but i assume you have like a trusty pet dog to keep you company, or do you live with family.

what about the marrying your cousin concept, is it growing or decreasing? or is it that " one generation"[old timers] who need to pass on the tradition.

 

[Zee-Gen]

In genetics, it is a common misconception that consanguineous marriages will lead to genetic disorders……..in reality, however, allelic segregation is always random……always have a 50:50 chance of going either way……in nature, survival of the fittest rule applies everywhere……the most fittest of the sperm will reach the ova, fittest zygote will come into life and the diseased one will end up as being a stillbirth and/or if matured will become sterile (not able to reproduce)……than why consanguineous marriages are discouraged even by most geneticists……?????.........well the answer is simple, most of the diseases in nature are present in recessive form (the opposite is dominant) means two copies of an abnormal gene must be present in order for the disease or trait to develop…….if there is only one copy, one will become carrier and we don’t know about how much diseases we have right now in our body since we are just carriers. The disease will only show up when both copies from mother and father will unite together in case of recessive disease. Diseases, which show there expression in dominant form don’t require both alleles to be diseased ones……so if a family has some unique genetic disorder that is a result of recessive genes, geneticists think that, chances of having both recessive alleles unite together are more, but in reality it is always 50:50 be it either consanguinity or no consanguinity……hope this will help understanding this concept.

 

[SQ8]

ok great not the main point im after that was more of a finisher but ok. but i assume you have like a trusty pet dog to keep you company, or do you live with family.

what about the marrying your cousin concept, is it growing or decreasing? or is it that " one generation"[old timers] who need to pass on the tradition.

For the first, I will get a cat.
Second, it is a tradition that is pretty much gone now. Most marriages are either arranged outside of the family or based on infatuation/love/hormonal imbalances etc.

 

[Blue Marlin]

For the first, I will get a cat.
Second, it is a tradition that is pretty much gone now. Most marriages are either arranged outside of the family or based on infatuation/love/hormonal imbalances etc.

great your gonna one day be a lonley old cat man.

as for the second that is what happend to a friend of mine, and i had the pleasure of going to pakistani for the wedding. his mum boxed him of to a local. well its better than having sex with your own cousin.
homonal imbalance..... lol i can tell youv'e been scared by another mans horror

 

[gayMo]

For the first, I will get a cat.
Second, it is a tradition that is pretty much gone now. Most marriages are either arranged outside of the family or based on infatuation/love/hormonal imbalances etc.

I heard cat eat their owners when they become too old to defend themselves, is that true ?