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Size zero: The new fair & lovely?
Ayesha Siddiqui, the young Hyderabadi woman who created a fuss about being married to and dumped by Shoaib Malik, says it was all about being overweight. The facts of the case remain unclear but Maliks version also appeared to ratify the overweight angle. The cricketer said he was sent photos of some other smart girl (rather than) this fat girl ... Ayesha Siddiqui.
Can fat really change a persons life so dramatically? Do men really run away from fat girls? Chandigarh-based sociologist Dr Nirmal Sharma says most men may not care much about marrying or befriending a fat girl, but they are generally wary about flaunting a fat partner. Sharma says the Shoaib-Ayesha underlines the truth of this: Shoaib may have actually seen or known the real Ayesha before marrying her. But the problem between the couple started only after Shoaibs teammates allegedly said Bhabhiji is fat.
It is noteworthy, Sharma adds, that Ayeshas version has Shoaib yelling at her on the phone after his teammates ribbed him. He reportedly told her, I don't want to hear all this. Its embarrassing.
There are other Ayeshas around. Devika Virmani, a 26-year-old software engineer, says her story is eerily similar to Ayeshas, except that she was unmarried. She says: I have been obese since childhood but in spite of that, my classmate Vikrant, who is quite slim and fit, maintained a close relationship with me. He would always tell me that I would look great if I lose weight.
We were steady for two years but when it came to introducing me to his family and friends, he said he would do it once I slimmed down. In fact, he was so conscious about keeping the real me under wraps that he did not even add me on his social networking profile.
Soon enough, says Virmani, he dumped her. Do my extra kilos make people disregard everything else I have?she asks.
Mumbai-based fitness trainer Seema Gupta says she meets many anguished girls like Virmani. Many girls come to my fitness centre wanting to lose weight quickly to please their husbands or fiancees or boyfriends. Some narrate stories about how their relationships failed because they were overweight.
Delhi clinical psychologist Rajan Sharma explains that it is all about a mans ego. To feel good about ourselves, we largely depend on how others evaluate us - especially our peers and those from the opposite sex. So guys need a perfect-looking partner so that their boyfriends approve and they don't feel inferior. Indian girls are conditioned to the need to look good in order to find a husband and boys are trained to think they need do no more than have a good job, he adds. Sometimes, a fat Indian man suffers on account of being overweight but that is rare and it is the young Indian girl who is generally at the receiving end.
Delhi-based fitness consultant Dr Namita Agarwal says: Obesity definitely does take a toll on relationships. Besides, being obese lowers ones confidence and people tend to take advantage. Perhaps that is why Ayesha avoided making any public appearance even though she kept fighting the battle from behind the scenes.
Sharma says that till recently, weight was a celebrity struggle and fat was something the paparazzi trained their cameras on. But now, ordinary youngsters are increasingly obsessed with the thought of the perfect figure and the slimming industry is pushing this to extremes.
So is Size Zero the new fair and lovely? Yes, says Sharma. A decade ago, a fair complexion was the parameter to measure a girls beauty and eligibility as a bride. Today, its a slim figure. The phenomenon is depressing for many girls who find refuge in weight loss clinics, fat-free food and fad diets, and are ready to shell out thousands of rupees to their personal fitness trainers for every kilogram they shed with their help.
Size zero: The new fair & lovely? - The Times of India
Ayesha Siddiqui, the young Hyderabadi woman who created a fuss about being married to and dumped by Shoaib Malik, says it was all about being overweight. The facts of the case remain unclear but Maliks version also appeared to ratify the overweight angle. The cricketer said he was sent photos of some other smart girl (rather than) this fat girl ... Ayesha Siddiqui.
Can fat really change a persons life so dramatically? Do men really run away from fat girls? Chandigarh-based sociologist Dr Nirmal Sharma says most men may not care much about marrying or befriending a fat girl, but they are generally wary about flaunting a fat partner. Sharma says the Shoaib-Ayesha underlines the truth of this: Shoaib may have actually seen or known the real Ayesha before marrying her. But the problem between the couple started only after Shoaibs teammates allegedly said Bhabhiji is fat.
It is noteworthy, Sharma adds, that Ayeshas version has Shoaib yelling at her on the phone after his teammates ribbed him. He reportedly told her, I don't want to hear all this. Its embarrassing.
There are other Ayeshas around. Devika Virmani, a 26-year-old software engineer, says her story is eerily similar to Ayeshas, except that she was unmarried. She says: I have been obese since childhood but in spite of that, my classmate Vikrant, who is quite slim and fit, maintained a close relationship with me. He would always tell me that I would look great if I lose weight.
We were steady for two years but when it came to introducing me to his family and friends, he said he would do it once I slimmed down. In fact, he was so conscious about keeping the real me under wraps that he did not even add me on his social networking profile.
Soon enough, says Virmani, he dumped her. Do my extra kilos make people disregard everything else I have?she asks.
Mumbai-based fitness trainer Seema Gupta says she meets many anguished girls like Virmani. Many girls come to my fitness centre wanting to lose weight quickly to please their husbands or fiancees or boyfriends. Some narrate stories about how their relationships failed because they were overweight.
Delhi clinical psychologist Rajan Sharma explains that it is all about a mans ego. To feel good about ourselves, we largely depend on how others evaluate us - especially our peers and those from the opposite sex. So guys need a perfect-looking partner so that their boyfriends approve and they don't feel inferior. Indian girls are conditioned to the need to look good in order to find a husband and boys are trained to think they need do no more than have a good job, he adds. Sometimes, a fat Indian man suffers on account of being overweight but that is rare and it is the young Indian girl who is generally at the receiving end.
Delhi-based fitness consultant Dr Namita Agarwal says: Obesity definitely does take a toll on relationships. Besides, being obese lowers ones confidence and people tend to take advantage. Perhaps that is why Ayesha avoided making any public appearance even though she kept fighting the battle from behind the scenes.
Sharma says that till recently, weight was a celebrity struggle and fat was something the paparazzi trained their cameras on. But now, ordinary youngsters are increasingly obsessed with the thought of the perfect figure and the slimming industry is pushing this to extremes.
So is Size Zero the new fair and lovely? Yes, says Sharma. A decade ago, a fair complexion was the parameter to measure a girls beauty and eligibility as a bride. Today, its a slim figure. The phenomenon is depressing for many girls who find refuge in weight loss clinics, fat-free food and fad diets, and are ready to shell out thousands of rupees to their personal fitness trainers for every kilogram they shed with their help.
Size zero: The new fair & lovely? - The Times of India
