Joke

[Marshmallow]

Btw, what is a buff in when the buff breaks?!

f is silent ....its bough ...a branch....hahaha plz xcuse my spellings....hav bad habbit of typin short n usin slang like we type in text in mobile msgs....

 

[Dubious]

f is silent ....its bough ...a branch....hahaha plz xcuse my spellings....hav bad habbit of typin short n usin slang like we type in text in mobile msgs....

ok

 

[Dubious]

Here are the ones I remember:

Baa, Baa Black Sheep - EnchantedLearning.com

Bingo -EnchantedLearning.com

Cat and Fiddle -ENCHANTED LEARNING SOFTWARE

Hot Cross Buns! -ENCHANTED LEARNING SOFTWARE

I'm a Little Teapot - EnchantedLearning.com

Humpty Dumpty -ENCHANTED LEARNING SOFTWARE I think someone did humpty dumpty during my A-levels something to do with wall street crash and gambling...


Jack and Jill -ENCHANTED LEARNING SOFTWARE someone did Jack and Jill as child labour...

The Itsy Bitsy Spider -ENCHANTED LEARNING SOFTWARE

Knick, Knack, Paddy Whack (This Old Man) -EnchantedLearning.com I remember this 1 from barney

Little Jack Horner -ENCHANTED LEARNING SOFTWARE

Little Bo Peep - Rebus Rhymes

Little Miss Muffet -Rebus Rhymes

London Bridge is Falling Down - Rebus Rhymes never knew the whole one till I read this

 

[Dubious]

I also knew these:

Rain -ENCHANTED LEARNING SOFTWARE

Old Mother Hubbard -ENCHANTED LEARNING SOFTWARE Never knew it was this lengthy!

Old MacDonald Had A Farm -EnchantedLearning.com

Mockingbird -ENCHANTED LEARNING SOFTWARE Never knew it was soo lengthy talk about spoilt kids!

Peter Piper - EnchantedLearning.com

Polly, Put the Kettle On -ENCHANTED LEARNING SOFTWARE

***** Cat Rhyme-ENCHANTED LEARNING SOFTWARE Classic plague problem!

THE QUEEN OF HEARTS -ENCHANTED LEARNING SOFTWARE Just read the full poem for the 1st time

Ring Around the Rosie - EnchantedLearning.com someone told me this was when UK was infested with the black death or something...

She Sells Seashells - EnchantedLearning.com

There was an Old Woman -ENCHANTED LEARNING SOFTWARE Child abuse!

Three Blind Mice -EnchantedLearning.com

Three Little Kittens - EnchantedLearning.com Didnt know it was soo lengthy

Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star - Rebus Rhymes Even this 1 is lengthy!!

Wee Willie Winkie - EnchantedLearning.com

I seem to know half of many of these

Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star - Rebus Rhymes

 

[surya kiran]

The phone rings and the lady of the house answers,

"Hello."

"Mrs. Sanders, please."

"Speaking."

"Mrs. Sanders, this is Doctor Jones at Saint Agnes Laboratory.
When your husband's doctor sent his biopsy to the lab last week,
a biopsy from another Mr. Sanders arrived as well...
We are now uncertain which one belongs to your husband.
Frankly, either way the results are not too good."

"What do you mean?" Mrs. Sanders asks nervously.

"Well, one of the specimens tested positive for Alzheimer's and the
other one tested positive for HIV.
We can't tell which is which."

"That's dreadful! Can you do the test again?" questioned Mrs.Sanders.

"Normally we can, but MEDICARE will only pay for these expensive tests once."

"Well, what am I supposed to do now?"

"The MEDICARE Helpdesk recommend that you drop your husband off
somewhere in the middle of town.

If he finds his way home, don't sleep with him

 

[Marshmallow]

 

[Marshmallow]

 

[A.Razzaq]

LOL

 

[Manindra]

Khudi ko karke buland itna , chadha woh jaise-taise
Khuda ne bande se khud puchha abe ab utrega kaise

खुदी को करके बुलंद इतना , चढ़ा वो जैसे-तैसे
खुद ने बन्दे से खुद पूछा , अबे अब उतरेगा कैसे

خودی کو کرکے بلند اتنا چڑھ وو جیسے-تیسے
خدا نے بندے سے خود پوچھ ابے اب اتریگا کیسے

 

[Manindra]

Ek bhikhari ki 5 crore ki lottery lag gayi
Lottery walon ne puchha itne paison ka tum kya karoge
Bhikhari bola ,"Main ek bahut bada mandir banwaunga aur usme akele bheekh mangunga."

 

[Khalnaldo]

Teach a man to fish and he will eat for a lifetime.
Teach a feminist to fish and she will accuse you of patronising her, claim she knew how to do it anyway and that even if she didn't, she could easily work it out without the help of a man.


I don't get why Americans don't make movies like Star Wars these days.
The rebellious underdogs flying their planes in a suicide mission into the heart of a base to destroy the mighty empire that is threatening to overtake their homeland doesn't seem to appeal to them anymore.


"I'm not racist," I said to my mate, "but I prefer my sandwiches cut diagonally."
"...but that's not racist," he said.
"Exactly," I replied. "I said I wasn't racist."

 

[Marshmallow]

Ek bhikhari ki 5 crore ki lottery lag gayi
Lottery walon ne puchha itne paison ka tum kya karoge
Bhikhari bola ,"Main ek bahut bada mandir banwaunga aur usme akele bheekh manunga."

lolls........

@Armstrong @Leader @Jazzbot

 

[Marshmallow]

 

[Marshmallow]

 

[Marshmallow]