Leonard: You wanna talk about not getting love from a parent, you know what I used to do when I was little to have some sensation of human contact? Penny: Yeah you grabbed your penis and wouldn't let go. Penny: ...Your mother told me. Leonard: Course she did. Anyway that's not what I was gonna say. When I was 10 years old, I built a hugging machine. Penny: A hugging machine? Leonard: Yeah, I got a dressmakers mannequin, I stuffed it with an electric blanket so it would be warm and I built two radio-controlled arms that would hug me and pat my back. Penny: That is so sad. Leonard: You know what the saddest part was? Penny: What? Leonard: My father used to borrow it.
Sheldon: I'm polymerized tree sap and you're an inorganic adhesive, so whatever verbal projectile you launch in my direction is reflected off of me, returns to its original trajectory and adheres to you.